I got lost in the music for a while, and i had to blot away tears a few times...
Carl shared the Alicia Keys tiny desk, go not ever partway through the first song and had to blink that shit out of my eyes, hit stop and stop working at my desk.
Was riding in this morning... not good... you know we all talked about that category of feeling like shit and esp when you can't place exactly what it is that is making you feel like shit and then you feel even worse because you are one of the lucky ones and then it makes it even worse and you just sort of spiral down into uselessness? yeah... that...
I'm tired. Like holy shit how fucking tired I had no idea. But haven't been sleeping much once the sun comes up, haven't been sleeping well when the sun is down. haven't managed to take a nap because i have been drinking enough coffee to be functional and well that ain't working for the sleep, have been stopping drinking coffee soon enough to fall asleep.
And the world is fucking crazy... I'm worried more about my friends than ever, although, I gotta wonder, do I really have any friends, maybe not. They are all just people that I know. yeah this is def in line with how i'm feeling at the moment - it'll probably change - you can read into it what you want...
It was a slog in this morning, not because of the ride the day before. Just was a slog. The MTB ride was awesome. there was one stupid steep climb that took every last everything to get up, I got up it, and my HR stayed pegged for a surprisingly long time. The effort was total, maxed out oxygen capacity, curious.
But the ride was awesome, fun. Who'd a though I'd feel perfectly happy riding XC through rock gardens on a singlespeed mid-fat 29r trail bike. Hell I only have 120mm travel up front, is it really even a trail bike? But with that dropper down zoom zoom.
Did drop a chain, managed to avoid serious injury. Need to tension it back up. Lost a few PSI in the tires - running under 10 is not fun, 10.5 is probably the lowest I can go, but i started at 11.5, somehow lost something out there. Added more and it held, checked when i got back and it was 11.
Really love that Topeak digital floor pump. One stroke is 0.5 psi on the gauge with my tires.
I don't want to make anyone who feels slighted by my comment above - i'm just feeling pretty lonely i guess. And tired. And overwhelmed. But
but...
That's pretty much normal - keep pushing on until it passes - keep doing what i can and then do a little more for everyone else.
Amor Fati Motherfuckers
heddwch
G
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