paywalls are a tool of prejudice

Been giving space to this 

'Paywall the news separating those who can afford it from those who can't ... prejudice and bias in the access to information and knowledge by a paywall'

It is another one of those HFS moments reading @TochiTrueStory Goliath

Think on that..

Creators, journalists, writers, photojournalists... Yes they all deserve to get paid, but when the best information and news is hiding behind a paywall, it becomes a privilege, a division, a furthering of the wealth and class gap that is so often racially drawn. 

I don't have the answer, but it feels like a significant challenge to society right now. And a wedge effortlessly and irreparably dividing right now. 

How to both give the documentarians a living wage and free and equitable access to the information and news? 

take 10 minutes

 And watch this:

new high speed

For listening to a book. 

I can't quite imagine what it would be like to listen to this book at 1.0 speed. I was at 1.5x this morning on the bike ride in, this book is a good distraction for what the fuck is going on, and it is due tomorrow and while I have a physical copy and have been doing a hybrid read, lately when I've tried to read, i'm tired and the book is good but not gripping and action packed enough to keep me awake. Sadly it also isn't enough to put me to sleep right away, just land me in that purgatory of too sleepy to do much but not sleepy enough to fall right asleep.

So there I was, fuck it, lets go to 1.75x.

Big gap

 

Been spending words in a draft, not a blog post draft or an email draft. But digital draft. Words that I'm capturing because I'm uncertain if they should be shared, edited, or just deleted after some time.

Strange few days, heck week? Since Friday at least.

searching for equilibrium

 Always a challenge. 

I suppose you can think about equilibrium as moderation. GeWilli doesn't do that last thing very well. 

Hasn't really found the the other thing.

hit a new level of uncontrolled

Freakout.

So y'all know the gallery has been on my mind for a long time. Right?

Thinking, too much

 Wondering, really, if all my social issues can be fit into a clinical diagnosis.

Sure seems like it lately.

can't stop, won't stop

 So now I learn that shit ain't something someone made up about shitty CX canti brakes?

Damn

This one's for KF

 

Getting all emotional at the ending there...

t O's book

Like a candle in a room, dying, slowly dimmer, then eventually nothing, blackness takes over, and as it does your memories fade and you become the darkness. 

Your conscienceness fading as the light goes away...

Another passage, 

"ever wonder why seminars on white privilege are just a bunch of white people trying to figure out what's wrong with being lucky? "

Anyway, read books, people who get paid to put words together are really good at it. 

Do a wheelie Danny

 Like all Danny's productions, this is just fantastically entertaining. Can't help but smile.

even with everything going on, in order to face what makes us uncomfortable. 

we need a few moments like this:

and if the algorithm doesn't push you here...  you should watch it:

if you've been keep score

 GeWilli has not been so good at staying ahead of the exhaustion curve. He seems to keep moving until he can't, collapses, recovers only enough to get back up and start moving again, just not fast enough not to be clobbered in a short timeframe.

Like woops, now.

ride bikes

 Does look pretty amazing to ride and live there...

still only one line

 and also no wonder people false negative on these Abbott tests, they are crazy complicated and fussy compared to the iHealth tests i'm used to using.

click over on www. zineee. com just because, okay cut paste and remove the spaces - keep the link track backs clean, and thinking about engagement, if i don't put one of these things

Cleaning out old flickr photos

 And well damn if there isn't some gems in there.

Guess I had it on autobackup starting at somepoint in '14...  kind of wish I'd started it sooner but that's probably when the phone filled up the first time. Maybe. Didn't have a smart phone till '13. Late adapter.

There was a conversation, more or less one sided, I thanked someone for their words on twitter in a DM, they replied three phrases that literally became something I kept going back to. Again and again over the next year.

It sucked, and yeah there was a huge victory fist pump when i found it. Bunch of other amazing images. I'd backed flickr up once before, a couple years ago, I had logged back in and my account must have gone from dormant to oh hey you have too many pictures, pay us or we'll delete them all. so I deleted them. And holy crap that was not easy to do.

I erased a few key words and who sent it but it probably won't take a genius with twitter to dig through and find the original thread. Hell I found it. 

Another good one is from Canton:

This dude. We both lost our fathers roughly around the same time, we wound up doing most of a full lap at Crosstobeerfest, riding side by side, talking about it, was pretty amazing, unwittingly we had a long string of people just riding behind us, patiently, while we shared some pretty emotional stuff.

Brad's one of those good people out there. Like really genuinely good and amazing people. If you see him, give him a donut.

heddwch
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The noose is closing in

 Having escaped getting covid for this long, 2.5 years if you track it back to the earliest spread and transmission of Sars-Cov2. man it would have been so much better if they called it Sars2. So much scarier sounding than covid or the vid or the 'rona.

And finally after that time our house has one positive. Docs refuse to prescribe paxlovid, no co-morbidities. How about we give it to everyone who can benefit. Gotta be enough doses now, no? Ration care, sure why not. Honestly timing isn't' bad, assuming the rest of the house makes it clear w/o tripping a rapid positive. There's a lot going on and the bonus change in plans means less hectic house cleaning today.

Headwind has been nuts and of course it shifted just a little more out of the east than north and instead of a nice tailwind home last night it was pretty much full cross wind. 

And just as I said something about the knee feeling better, well wouldn't you know, riding the singlespeed commuter, well lets say, didn't feel great. A little better today, and no, no smackdown for me. Just still tired, and really can't quite get to that mental state of wanting to go hard on the road bike. it is strange, but then I haven't been able to get out  on the MTB either, and want to but man time. Where is the fucking time? Honestly a part of me was kind of looking forward to a positive test for myself yesterday. 5 days of doing nothing, not leaving the house...  sounds pretty amazing.

Also pretty sad that it takes getting infected with a virus that has the potential to shrink your brain, damage your heart and countless other unknown health issues sounds good. 

Maybe just need to take those 5 days off while I'm healthy instead? Maybe after I finish this week, and get everything done next week that I won't get done this week and then maybe, then? except for all the other stuff on the calendar.

Tweaked the side bar again, no point sending you to dead links, updated a few, added two bike shops for obvious reasons, not that anyone clicks on there. I should probably put some Topeak linkage up. Remember if you need something I've got a code for you that will take 20% of the price off any in stock item purchased direct from Topeak.  
20% discount code WILLIAMS-22 at https://www.topeak.com/us/en

There making it stand out. No i don't get any cash or bonus or extra stuff if you order with it, but they have been sending me fun cool awesome shit to use and abuse and talk about so thing about it as a thank you to everyone who has to put up with me talking about it. Now hopefully they'll be releasing a 350PSI digital shock pump soon. I think I need just a little over 299PSI in the shock on the Top fuel.

okay- gotta go shuffle TBs of data around. Have an 8TB NAS that is totally full. Good thing data is cheap now. 

And yeah, I'll be the one still wearing a mask everywhere. given what I'm seeing? if you interact with people at all, you probably should be wearing one now too. 

heddwch
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tidy narratives

 "The truth, as usual, is both and also neither, too complex for a tidy narrative. But we keep trying, don’t we, to tell our story? Like anyone attempting to weave tangled threads of experience, I hope to grasp something tangible from the abstraction of memory. "

Well isn't that just a fucking brilliantly perfect pile of words describing what many web loggers and diary-ers (diarrhea allusion intended) do with their spaces?

How many of you have waited for the line, the bad line, to show up on a Rapid test? Guess what, if it shows up it will show up instantly. That 15 minute wait? just to make sure. But as the fluid flows past in the nitrocellulose filter, it will react instantly.

If you start testing while it is strong, and watch it, it will fade, slowly away.

This story is in process. It is a stressful one. This pandemic shit, it is nuts, it is scary, it is insane how many people are infected right now. 

Last class happens soon. Then some grading and then i can move on to the rest of the absolutely insane.

Stay well out there my friends!

Heddwch
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stuff

https://www.thecut.com/2022/05/roe-v-wade-limits-of-privilege.html

Well this booster #2 is kicking my ass and my arm is functional, but barely. 

Had 2 novel symptoms though. 

1) Realizing that 4 years in your 20s feels like the same amount of time between 30 and 50.

2) Hard realization of how short our lifetimes are in the scheme of humanity and history.

Good move skipping the gravel ride, also good move skipping work today.

It sucks but it is what it is. 

- wrote that yesterday - 

got up at 4:30am to get the two headed to the rowing race in NH ready to go, making food, coffee...  then I went back to bed, Hey it is light at 5:20am. 

And then I feel back asleep hard till 8:15, thought about texting that I wouldn't make Dirt Church but fell back asleep for another hour, then slept another 30 min...  got up, ate a little, browsed netflix, then cued up the replay of the Women's XCO. Still watching that now, they are on the last lap.

Booster and life kicking my ass. I'm tired. And looking at what I'm trying to do lately? GO FIGURE HOLY SHIT. On the other side I'm getting a lot done. Just not riding much. Getting done what I can get done.

So much to do though. Not sure how to get through the next week. Thinking about 4 years ago, thinking about further back...

My knee seems to be getting slowly better, still not 100% but def getting close. 

But kind of shockingly tired. As in fuuuuck me seriously? So tired, some how need to recover. Funny how I can find the energy if i need it but when I don't creally need it, feels like system failure. Hard to describe. But there's so much to do, how to do it all. But also rest? But then for the pedaling thing, that really would benefit most from rest. But also need to ride. So what to do? I mean I can go out and do a 20 mile hard MTB ride but then i'm dead for a day or two right now. 

Really not sure how to solve all this and still meet all the obligations. 

guess i'll work it out somehow

heddwch
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greasy joe's?

 The gravel grinder not the usual Dirt Church location.

Had kind of thought the Hellraiser edition would be awesome. I also thought maybe doing smackdown tonight would be a thing.

Thinking no on both. 

I'd like to do the hellraiser but i think maybe I might do it solo, it is a tough ride and there's little refueling so it takes serious logistics. That last time I did it solo was baaaaaaad, but good but also not good.

Was thinking this morning about the Top Fuel, get the crank sorted and then was thinking about the tires, those soft SE4s are heavy and not the best but also are on there and with the cush core are a pain to change and do i really want to get another set of wheels (obvs yes but also no). 

And then there's all the other shit going on. 

Fuck - that sense of doom and dread this morning after yesterday's shit...

On the plus side I feel a little better than yesterday, just like a tuesday has felt for a while, but still not energized enough to go smackdowning.

Gotta figure this shit out somehow, def need to starting riding more and skipping a big fun ride is a dumb idea but other shit has to happen. And I'm tired. 

Also this morning I thought about starting to take the long way in. Might not be a bad idea.

Def need to start the Tower Hill morning meeting routine again too. But would be good to find someone to join on that. Someone maybe just a little faster than me (i mean that's pretty much everyone anyway) 

And then...  what bike? Got dreaming of a new Road bike but i already have a way too expensive fancy MTB, that said a new road bike would be really nice. Oh well fuck it - only benefit of this frustrating morning is I have time to sit here and monitor shit with just enough attention free that I can smash the keyboard.

heddwch
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trying to figure out

 why i feel like such garbage on Mondays lately.

Today's no exception, it is like last week but at least last week I went out and rode 20 miles in the woods. This week? 

nothing and yet here I am zombie...

speaking of zombie:

Time to ride home before it gets too much later.

Maybe I can even dodge the rain, almost made it in dry this morning, tailwind was appreciated, but it is probably still out there.

May make some green curry tonight, sounds yummy but so much chopping, we'll see.

amor fati motherfuckers

heddwch
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