so strange

state of mind now

 sinus infection has kicked in a little, hopefully it stays out of the lungs - fact/observation - not related or strange. Also got the flu shot today, sure it is a racket and companies stand to make millions and millions on the shot, all for some scientific wild ass guess cocktail of non-infectious strains. But hey - figure they change it every year - just adds to the catalog of familiarity that my immune system has....  can't find a good argument against it.

Did the wellness thing while I was at it. Numbers are good, people are crazy. Did accidentally get into a discussion, asking the "choose healthy sugar" lady if her pancreas could tell the difference between sugar from fruit or added or refined sugar. She kind of fell back on the but the fruit is better for you line of bullshit, and I said Type 2 diabetes is still diabetes.

Was reading more of that new book. So good. More thinking. So bad.

Alone. Me.

going to let this one simmer tonight before posting.

=---=---=

and so i let it simmer - did a bit of a rescue of someone stranded in the snow last night, never got to this yesterday morning, haven't read much since then.

I forget where i was headed with the alone part - except that I need to be alone but also not alone - kind of the typical shy introvert that craves contact with sympathetic and friendly humans.

Just got fucking derailed and chewed out. Nothing significant but still enough to take a pretty okay day and destroy everything I've worked at building up over the last few days.

I did at least get the Gallery stuff submitted before that happened.

Fuck...

No bike racing this weeekend...

Riding in this morning was like dumping a slurpee over each foot with each pedal stroke.

The low bottom bracket plus the rain saturated snow and pouring rain meant the wave off of the front tire on the bike path was soaking my feet.

I didn't put on winter cycling shoes, or shoe covers. My feet were fucking COLD.

And the gloves I grabbed, i have only used them in the cold, they work for that. They DO NOT work in the rain. They filled up with water, nice cold water. trapped the water in like it keeps the air out. Kind of wetsuit style I guess. But it was not good.

Managed to make it without any lingering issue and everything is dry right now for changing and getting dressed and riding back home.

Fuck...

still really bothered by the issue - assured it would all be okay and not a problem but I could have handled it better and am just sad angry and pissed and 'derailed' is a good way to put it.

oh well...

heddwch
G