So season of Cyclocross has started.
much like it did last year first was Kalon Cross and second was Quad cross.
Difference? Instead of being a week apart they were back to back, saturday and sunday.
Kalon course was much better for me than last year. Hurt like hell and I wiped out hard pre-riding with a couple PSI too much in the front wheel. Left arm is still super sore and bruised. Foot is better though.
Shorter ups but maybe more ups, def lots of coasting downhill as fast as you can and turning and all that. Last year I struggled but didn't - well shit results aren't there right now - they got overwritten with this years results. Last year I got lapped IIRC, now I'm doubting it but who knows, last year was tough.
The tires, well still getting used to them but figured them out a bit more at Quad, need some more time to dial in pressures and comfort level with them. Some Wed night action might be required.
I stayed on the lead lap. Seems kind of lame to have that as a goal. but it is what it is and I was happy not to get lapped by a guy on #CXHairsHeat index of the week. He was riding the run-up, on his single speed. And he took a dirt nap.
Bonus for me is that I hopped the railroad ties every lap except the first, I kept Matt A in sight most of the race, didn't get lapped, passed a couple people after a VERY relaxed start at the back of the tiny field. Forgot the HRM so strava isn't telling me it was a much harder effort than normal. It was painful but good, could I have gone faster? I don't know, I don't think so yet. I was pretty close to the limit.
I left there and headed to the grocery store, then made dinner (burgers and fancy potatoes - simple) and tried to sleep, wanted to sleep in but E was supposed to get up really early and guide. She got up, i fell back asleep, she came back to bed, the guy has a migraine, no running, i'm back awake again, tired. Pushed the start of coffee back a bit but managed to eat and get out of the house and to the venue with time to hang out and catch up with everyone who wasnt there at Kalon the day before.
Was good. But man I was tired. Mentally and physically. Not sick but that fatigue level of just being tired.
Raced. Had a good start. Lined up behind big Keith B, who was behind Stupid fast Conner. A super fast old dude behind a fearless crazy fast kid in the front row and then me. A good spot, I can start, even if it means I'm where I don't belong. My agro level is SUPER chill compared to everyone around me. I'm doing what I can to hang out up close to the front without burning matches I don't have. Works out pretty well actually. Wind up where I shouldn't be but not really that far out of place and not THAT uncomfortable. Maybe can stay there in a few more races. Maybe not but hey, who knows.
There was a log, hopped it every time, lots/most were dismounting. I did dismount for the barriers, they were high speed and i can float over them, not sure i can hop but it would be slower if i did. Was racing well, but Giles came by just before the long drag back to the parking lot and I mentally broke down a bit - can see it on the HRM data, it dips a bit, I lost focus, and then chip caught me, and passed me and fuck I gotta pay attention. I made a few mistakes that let him get there, and then drilled it to get him back. unfortunately Mike W was coming and I finished literally on Brad smith's wheel as they came into the finish 1 and 2 w/o a time separation. i was like a few seconds away from NOT GETTING LAPPED. Normally not a big deal right? But man it would have been nice to not have been lapped, however, it meant not having to do another lap and I was fucking cooked. I kept it upright, but was so tired.
And then slept like crap last night. combo legs feeling bad, the bruised shoulder and a tender spot in the ribs. And the weird temps.
Got a super painful hamstring cramp at work, end of day, going to put shoes on. It still hurts. Ouch.
But what doesn't hurt? My lower back. I could barely walk last year after racing. This year? Feels great. There were lower back connection issues, but more from soreness of the single speed full body torque application.
Thinking less and less about Freetown 50 and more about maybe just doing a MTB ride and relaxing.
In an effort to work on this fatigue I dialed back the coffee today. Cut in HALF what I have been drinking during the week. One quad this morning and One pot at work, normally two and two.
And guess what? I'm fucking EXHAUSTED right now and it is glorious.
going to put the leftovers away and go get in bed, yeah it is early. So what.
I'm tired.
Lets see how long I can keep up the low caffeine to help realize and deal with the lack of sleep fatigue and be more rested the next race.
Probably going to skip any hard pedalling tomorrow. Not gonna ride the e-bike like I did today but not going out to do dirty or regular smackdown. Need more recovery. I'm old I guess. Older than I used to be.
I can't live like an athlete but i can at least try to catch up on my sleep and not be in such a deep always tired hole. or at least maybe try and make the hole a little shallower.
And cutting back on the coffee is a good start. Kind out of hand how much I'm drinking. Def in the habit more than need, but loading up on coffee isn't the best approach for feeling well rested.
Putting my feet up, might try and read some more Snow Crash, book is good but fits and spurts, it is kind of one where I'm a fan but not a fan want to know what happens but not loving what's happening in the book. Weird in a way. I notice a few books are like that for me but others not. I'll get through it though... maybe. This at least is easier to read the Gibson's stuff but I can see why Neal is compared to him... and maybe I should have taken that as a skip this book. But those 'must read' sci-fi lists... gotta read em all.
maybe i'll get through a chapter or two
heddwch
G
Monday, September 09, 2019
Friday, September 06, 2019
low pro
profile - yeah low on the pro level of everything it seems lately...
Started the day remembering I forgot to check something at the shop.
Then spent too long in the shower debating how to prepare for the weekend. Do I put the road tires on the Single speed before leaving, might make me late, i'd have to swap the single cog off, - re-adjust the brakes but that's it. No big deal. But I'd stll have to ride the single speed and for some reason last night on the ride home just before getting home I bonked hard, exhaustion? too much coffee? not enough food? all of the above. it was bad. This raising the metabolism thing is stupid. Soooo no, not going to do that - strap the wheels to the rack on the e-Bike (for sale, know some one who wants an awesome drop bar fendered ebike commuter in a size 58? Lemme know). Will swing through the shop on the way home, put the Rocket Rons on that worked so well at Fruitlands in the mud on the alloy wheels. If the course is wet and slick the heavier wheels probably will be fine and I won't have to worry about changing the carbons. And if it dries out well then I'll have the black mambas. No more showing up to a race with Rain in the forecast riding tires that are SUPER shitty in the wet.
So this raising metabolism thing, helping with the weight? Not really that much. Body comp? maybe, pants are fitting better. Pedaling? maybe best results there?
Smackdown time metrics weren't really that much better, but they weren't that bad and I had some really strong sections and felt strong at the end. So while i wasn't going THAT much faster and still got dropped on Pine (and everywhere else it went up) I didn't get dropped by as much and even while i went as hard as I could I recovered faster. So better?
Good enough that it was a good ride and I'm done with the road for now. I think.
CX tomorrow. And sunday. Single speed both days.
Running a 38x15. Good? Maybe last year I ran a 34x15. That was fine, but slow and spinny, but faster out of the turns. but fuck that - it isn't my style. It is good for some stuff but atypical for me. Can't try and make me into something I am not. Magic gear always used to be 46x17 or 44x17.... too tall for most, but i was faster when pushing a harder gear. Am I as fast or strong as I once wasy? Probably not. But lets pretend that I can get close to that someday.
Last year's Ratio was 4.4, this year going with 4.9... 46x17 is 5.2 and the 44x17 5.0
so hitting in with the 38x15 seems pretty damn on the money. Just a touch easier but still pretty tough. What does that mean?
Maybe a good thing. Trying to focus on that.
Got distracted this morning when I read that a friend, a close friend of 20 years or so was diagnosed with stage 4 prostate cancer that has moved on into his bones.
Kind of damper on the morning. Catastrophically derailing is what I said on Twitter.
Distracting... emotional...
managed to get through what I had to this morning, more productive than not after I finally went out and got lunch. yeah got home and was so cracked my wife ordered pizza, i physically couldn't cook dinner. Gonna give that a go tonight. maybe try and get home earlier. Gonna maybe race in the NBX team shit - if Matt B gets me kit today. Yeah Prov Velo is my thing but the kit is worn and the new stuff isn't here yet. I've got the old 2014 stuff to wear, actually fond one extra skinsuit in my size. the one I wore that year is destroyed, elastic leg bands are not elastic and are falling apart, lycra the same. Hell most of my vermarc shit is shredded. So hoping Matt has some stuff to race in. Might as well race for the shop i work at, no?
Not a ton of people signed up for tomorrow's event, Sunday's got more than double the number in the singlespeed field. The only thing I'm worried about is getting enough warm up in. Can't put my bike on the trainer that I have, not sure what the solution is other than just ride around on the roads near the course or something else.
Will figure that out this weekend.
Seriously thinking about doing the Freetown 50 race next weekend. Yeah I know, I've ridden the mtb exactly 2x in the woods and I'm thinking about doing a 50 mile MTB race at the start of CX season.
Kind of think it would be hella fun. And no Gloucester means a weekend of expensive racing is off the calendar sooooooooo.... ALSO there's a Clydesdale category, with no one signed up for it yet... hmmm... I won the Gloucester Grind MTB race in the 200+ weight class...
BUT 50 miles is a long ride... on a Mountain Bike. reg doesn't close for a week. I have plenty of time to overthink it (and no - there isn't a CX w/in 90 min drive that weekend or wasn't last i checked - well hold on there is one in Nasuha 2hrs+ away and Holyoke also 2hrs+)
The Nanoscape stuff has been good, finding inspiration in the water, learning a bit about what I'm looking at, seeing cool new shit. Need to refocus more on prints and what to do with them at some point but till I figure that out I'm just gonna keep exploring samples.
before I ramble on too much or describe the difficulty i have in following pro US CX i'm going to sign off, close up the lab, try and figure out when I can take a two vacation days before the end of the month so I don't lose them. and before my brain dump starts really unloading, like about taking K up to college and the rest of the weekend and everything else building up...
lets see what happens this weekend eh?
heddwch
G
Started the day remembering I forgot to check something at the shop.
Then spent too long in the shower debating how to prepare for the weekend. Do I put the road tires on the Single speed before leaving, might make me late, i'd have to swap the single cog off, - re-adjust the brakes but that's it. No big deal. But I'd stll have to ride the single speed and for some reason last night on the ride home just before getting home I bonked hard, exhaustion? too much coffee? not enough food? all of the above. it was bad. This raising the metabolism thing is stupid. Soooo no, not going to do that - strap the wheels to the rack on the e-Bike (for sale, know some one who wants an awesome drop bar fendered ebike commuter in a size 58? Lemme know). Will swing through the shop on the way home, put the Rocket Rons on that worked so well at Fruitlands in the mud on the alloy wheels. If the course is wet and slick the heavier wheels probably will be fine and I won't have to worry about changing the carbons. And if it dries out well then I'll have the black mambas. No more showing up to a race with Rain in the forecast riding tires that are SUPER shitty in the wet.
So this raising metabolism thing, helping with the weight? Not really that much. Body comp? maybe, pants are fitting better. Pedaling? maybe best results there?
Smackdown time metrics weren't really that much better, but they weren't that bad and I had some really strong sections and felt strong at the end. So while i wasn't going THAT much faster and still got dropped on Pine (and everywhere else it went up) I didn't get dropped by as much and even while i went as hard as I could I recovered faster. So better?
Good enough that it was a good ride and I'm done with the road for now. I think.
CX tomorrow. And sunday. Single speed both days.
Running a 38x15. Good? Maybe last year I ran a 34x15. That was fine, but slow and spinny, but faster out of the turns. but fuck that - it isn't my style. It is good for some stuff but atypical for me. Can't try and make me into something I am not. Magic gear always used to be 46x17 or 44x17.... too tall for most, but i was faster when pushing a harder gear. Am I as fast or strong as I once wasy? Probably not. But lets pretend that I can get close to that someday.
Last year's Ratio was 4.4, this year going with 4.9... 46x17 is 5.2 and the 44x17 5.0
so hitting in with the 38x15 seems pretty damn on the money. Just a touch easier but still pretty tough. What does that mean?
Maybe a good thing. Trying to focus on that.
Got distracted this morning when I read that a friend, a close friend of 20 years or so was diagnosed with stage 4 prostate cancer that has moved on into his bones.
Kind of damper on the morning. Catastrophically derailing is what I said on Twitter.
Distracting... emotional...
managed to get through what I had to this morning, more productive than not after I finally went out and got lunch. yeah got home and was so cracked my wife ordered pizza, i physically couldn't cook dinner. Gonna give that a go tonight. maybe try and get home earlier. Gonna maybe race in the NBX team shit - if Matt B gets me kit today. Yeah Prov Velo is my thing but the kit is worn and the new stuff isn't here yet. I've got the old 2014 stuff to wear, actually fond one extra skinsuit in my size. the one I wore that year is destroyed, elastic leg bands are not elastic and are falling apart, lycra the same. Hell most of my vermarc shit is shredded. So hoping Matt has some stuff to race in. Might as well race for the shop i work at, no?
Not a ton of people signed up for tomorrow's event, Sunday's got more than double the number in the singlespeed field. The only thing I'm worried about is getting enough warm up in. Can't put my bike on the trainer that I have, not sure what the solution is other than just ride around on the roads near the course or something else.
Will figure that out this weekend.
Seriously thinking about doing the Freetown 50 race next weekend. Yeah I know, I've ridden the mtb exactly 2x in the woods and I'm thinking about doing a 50 mile MTB race at the start of CX season.
Kind of think it would be hella fun. And no Gloucester means a weekend of expensive racing is off the calendar sooooooooo.... ALSO there's a Clydesdale category, with no one signed up for it yet... hmmm... I won the Gloucester Grind MTB race in the 200+ weight class...
BUT 50 miles is a long ride... on a Mountain Bike. reg doesn't close for a week. I have plenty of time to overthink it (and no - there isn't a CX w/in 90 min drive that weekend or wasn't last i checked - well hold on there is one in Nasuha 2hrs+ away and Holyoke also 2hrs+)
The Nanoscape stuff has been good, finding inspiration in the water, learning a bit about what I'm looking at, seeing cool new shit. Need to refocus more on prints and what to do with them at some point but till I figure that out I'm just gonna keep exploring samples.
before I ramble on too much or describe the difficulty i have in following pro US CX i'm going to sign off, close up the lab, try and figure out when I can take a two vacation days before the end of the month so I don't lose them. and before my brain dump starts really unloading, like about taking K up to college and the rest of the weekend and everything else building up...
lets see what happens this weekend eh?
heddwch
G
Saturday, August 31, 2019
aftermath
well, that was way not fun but gave me an excuse to pee outside. yeah not something one normally does in such a tiny postage sample parcel of property.
once the drain slowly emptied out of the shower, i tried flushing the toilet in there - oh that was a bad idea. it started filling up faster than it was draining. Big old huge volume flusher. Nice blue ceramic. Never gets used. basement was set up for second apartment style living at one point, kitchen and everything down there. Why? Dunno.
only access is through the bulkhead door.
So that moment of oh shit water is going to go everywhere was avoided for a bit.
finished drying up the mess. set up some fans, turned on the AC to pull the humidity out... opted out of calling Roto-rooter, night plush holiday weekend probably was a decent premium on top of already a premium service.
Wait and see... the girls headed off to Dunkin for a pre-bedtime bathroom use, and this whole time last night I was physically at my limit, like full on limit.
Exhausted. The only day I haven't worked in the last 6 weeks or so was Sunday last week and that was Mt Bike day and other stuff. Not a rest day but no work.
So eventually everything is stabilized, but not draining well at all.
If you recall that last plumbing fun, the snaking of the bathroom drains, oh and the garbage disposal i guess, I have not had success clearing the drains chemically lately, just hit em with the snake. I put 10' of snake in the shower downstairs and it did nothing. Kind of like putting the chemicals in the shower upstairs. it does nothing.
BUT i had 3/4 of a container of the large size of the acid drain cleaner. The stuff that seems to work better than the more commonly sold sodium hydroxide base stuff.
And I emptied the whole damn container into the shower pan and left it overnight.
Finally in bed at 10:45, took a bit to settle, then a while tossing and turning before falling asleep, maybe i had too much coffee yesterday in an attempt to combat fatigue.
So, today, E got up at 5:45 am to go guide on a long run, i woke up at 5. had to pee, but didn't want to wake her so i dozed until her alarm went off - headed outside in the pre-dawn, then downstairs to check the floor. Fans and AC did a good job of drying it all overnight, nothing wet enough long enough for serious damage. And I put maybe half a gallon of water down the drain in the shower, either maybe to push whatever hadn't diffused overnight down or to dislodge the clog.
And went back to bed. And didn't wake up until 11am. Oops.
Drain testing seems to have gone well. Shower and toilet and just now a small load of laundry, all seems to be acting as it should and not filling up the shower pan.
Fucking birthday miracle.
Of course it is now after Noon and i've just slept and worked on sorting the drain, still piles of wet clothes outside to deal with (that were on the floor) waiting to get washed, and then the stuff that was down there waiting to get washed from who knows when that no one needed or bothered with.
Lots to do - not sure what it means for the rest of the weekend, going to opt out of everything today except the shopping, maybe in plans for riding tomorrow I'll see if i can address the creaking of the big wheel mt bike.
The day is mostly gone, i'm still tired, but relieved that the drain thing worked itself out with a little help and patience. Although I guess we'll be keeping a really close eye on it for a while. hopefully it will aid in a bit more organization around here. I'm not optimistic but i'm hopeful.
So yeah your birthday may not be a big deal, who cares, or it is has always been a fun day... mine? not so much.
heddwch
G
once the drain slowly emptied out of the shower, i tried flushing the toilet in there - oh that was a bad idea. it started filling up faster than it was draining. Big old huge volume flusher. Nice blue ceramic. Never gets used. basement was set up for second apartment style living at one point, kitchen and everything down there. Why? Dunno.
only access is through the bulkhead door.
So that moment of oh shit water is going to go everywhere was avoided for a bit.
finished drying up the mess. set up some fans, turned on the AC to pull the humidity out... opted out of calling Roto-rooter, night plush holiday weekend probably was a decent premium on top of already a premium service.
Wait and see... the girls headed off to Dunkin for a pre-bedtime bathroom use, and this whole time last night I was physically at my limit, like full on limit.
Exhausted. The only day I haven't worked in the last 6 weeks or so was Sunday last week and that was Mt Bike day and other stuff. Not a rest day but no work.
So eventually everything is stabilized, but not draining well at all.
If you recall that last plumbing fun, the snaking of the bathroom drains, oh and the garbage disposal i guess, I have not had success clearing the drains chemically lately, just hit em with the snake. I put 10' of snake in the shower downstairs and it did nothing. Kind of like putting the chemicals in the shower upstairs. it does nothing.
BUT i had 3/4 of a container of the large size of the acid drain cleaner. The stuff that seems to work better than the more commonly sold sodium hydroxide base stuff.
And I emptied the whole damn container into the shower pan and left it overnight.
Finally in bed at 10:45, took a bit to settle, then a while tossing and turning before falling asleep, maybe i had too much coffee yesterday in an attempt to combat fatigue.
So, today, E got up at 5:45 am to go guide on a long run, i woke up at 5. had to pee, but didn't want to wake her so i dozed until her alarm went off - headed outside in the pre-dawn, then downstairs to check the floor. Fans and AC did a good job of drying it all overnight, nothing wet enough long enough for serious damage. And I put maybe half a gallon of water down the drain in the shower, either maybe to push whatever hadn't diffused overnight down or to dislodge the clog.
And went back to bed. And didn't wake up until 11am. Oops.
Drain testing seems to have gone well. Shower and toilet and just now a small load of laundry, all seems to be acting as it should and not filling up the shower pan.
Fucking birthday miracle.
Of course it is now after Noon and i've just slept and worked on sorting the drain, still piles of wet clothes outside to deal with (that were on the floor) waiting to get washed, and then the stuff that was down there waiting to get washed from who knows when that no one needed or bothered with.
Lots to do - not sure what it means for the rest of the weekend, going to opt out of everything today except the shopping, maybe in plans for riding tomorrow I'll see if i can address the creaking of the big wheel mt bike.
The day is mostly gone, i'm still tired, but relieved that the drain thing worked itself out with a little help and patience. Although I guess we'll be keeping a really close eye on it for a while. hopefully it will aid in a bit more organization around here. I'm not optimistic but i'm hopeful.
So yeah your birthday may not be a big deal, who cares, or it is has always been a fun day... mine? not so much.
heddwch
G
Friday, August 30, 2019
unabiguously
shitty...
now we've got a bit of water in the basement to deal with, not much, but in places it isn't supposed to be
i'm totally fried from today - the ride there - the dogs waking me up for a bit at 3am - the ride home - the week- the day
riding back home thinking - i've tried to be ambiguous about the day, like lots of people seem to be on their own birthday, it is just a day right? Just another one. No big deal...
like there's a big dark cloud of shit hanging over - and i'm spent and now the basement is flooded and there's a pile of wet crap and i've gotta figure out where the fucking clog is... i kind of think it is the laundry line... worried it was the sink, there's some water under there from the not quite perfect half assed putting it back in after not making it work (new one is on order)... would have been easy if that was where all the water came from... but nope. not there.
i haven't been this tired since June... and that was after that ride across michigan.
i had just gotten ready to put my feet up and stretch out in bed for a few minutes
then the 'there's water down here' and well... fuck...
this sucks
now we've got a bit of water in the basement to deal with, not much, but in places it isn't supposed to be
i'm totally fried from today - the ride there - the dogs waking me up for a bit at 3am - the ride home - the week- the day
riding back home thinking - i've tried to be ambiguous about the day, like lots of people seem to be on their own birthday, it is just a day right? Just another one. No big deal...
like there's a big dark cloud of shit hanging over - and i'm spent and now the basement is flooded and there's a pile of wet crap and i've gotta figure out where the fucking clog is... i kind of think it is the laundry line... worried it was the sink, there's some water under there from the not quite perfect half assed putting it back in after not making it work (new one is on order)... would have been easy if that was where all the water came from... but nope. not there.
i haven't been this tired since June... and that was after that ride across michigan.
i had just gotten ready to put my feet up and stretch out in bed for a few minutes
then the 'there's water down here' and well... fuck...
this sucks
Thursday, August 29, 2019
damn- unexpected
This song came through the pandora...
had to hit a live version...
the first round of the studio version got to me...
Listening and watching Frank (damn he looks young) live brought back that show, i wish i'd gone to boston in May. But more i wish i hadn't been at that show alone, rather be there alone than not at all but still...
unexpected was fucking getting all weepy and watery eyed watching this, i must have watched this clip and the whole live show a dozen times... i know all the words...
but it gets me every fucking time.
just not like this...
i'm going to go hide on the SEM and get a few more images for the Nanoscape stuff as a distraction while I ponder what to do tomorrow... still don't know...
had to hit a live version...
the first round of the studio version got to me...
Listening and watching Frank (damn he looks young) live brought back that show, i wish i'd gone to boston in May. But more i wish i hadn't been at that show alone, rather be there alone than not at all but still...
unexpected was fucking getting all weepy and watery eyed watching this, i must have watched this clip and the whole live show a dozen times... i know all the words...
but it gets me every fucking time.
just not like this...
i'm going to go hide on the SEM and get a few more images for the Nanoscape stuff as a distraction while I ponder what to do tomorrow... still don't know...
Wednesday, August 28, 2019
Timing is everything eh?
Creaking bike, pending birthday, doubts about riding to the retreat - how early do i have to get up? what bike do i ride? do I really want to? should I drive? maybe I should see if someone wants to ride MTBs at like 4 on Friday...
hmmm... that might be better than riding there and back. Drive there, then go MTB'n after.
Such a good idea to start writing this.
Never would have thought of that.
Lots of friends with birthday's this time of year. Way too many of them it seems. Or is it that you just notice when others have their birthdays only when they are around yours?
Gonna go ride in the rain. get wet. get soaked.
not warm out, not cold either. wet is wet. shoulda brought changes of cloths.
Had a good streak going though - of positiveness -
chip wrote some stuff about our ride together - go check out his velocb blogspot thing
i'm getting out of here - before the rain gets worse.
i can kind of judge things based on inspiration to make dinner.
i have none.
but hey - maybe we'll just order pizza - i dunno
tired but not sleeping well - seems they go hand in hand. I get super tired - then sleep well, then don't need too much sleep, get too tired can't sleep until i'm so tired i just pass out, rinse repeat...
so who wants to ride mtbs on friday afternoon?
heddwch
G
hmmm... that might be better than riding there and back. Drive there, then go MTB'n after.
Such a good idea to start writing this.
Never would have thought of that.
Lots of friends with birthday's this time of year. Way too many of them it seems. Or is it that you just notice when others have their birthdays only when they are around yours?
Gonna go ride in the rain. get wet. get soaked.
not warm out, not cold either. wet is wet. shoulda brought changes of cloths.
Had a good streak going though - of positiveness -
chip wrote some stuff about our ride together - go check out his velocb blogspot thing
i'm getting out of here - before the rain gets worse.
i can kind of judge things based on inspiration to make dinner.
i have none.
but hey - maybe we'll just order pizza - i dunno
tired but not sleeping well - seems they go hand in hand. I get super tired - then sleep well, then don't need too much sleep, get too tired can't sleep until i'm so tired i just pass out, rinse repeat...
so who wants to ride mtbs on friday afternoon?
heddwch
G
Tuesday, August 27, 2019
Gathering clouds
I can feel them. New bike and the ride has worn off, feeling on edge, near a void...
Strange, good one moment, horrible the next, little stuff building..
Creak in the new bike today. Not under load, not out of the saddle, irregular, not a good creak sound.
Not doing smackdown was the correct call but brought up emotions and sadness esp with one of the people that liked syl's post about it on FB. Yeah yeah forget that place. I do, and then something like that sneaks in the periphery.
Actually thinking about the Freetown 50. Crazy? Yup. But there aren't any cx races close enough... And that just sounds fun. Also there's a Clydesdale category. Good for cx? Nope. Fun? Maybe.
Tired but not. Swyping instead of typing, typing is loud, swype is not...
Many feelings of failing lately, lost, rush from Sunday is gone.
Friday looking at the ride, well that is going to be a tough day, but don't really have a choice, can't not do it, can't/don't want to do it on the e bike. Cx bike? Yeah probably...
Hitting publish, should edit/read it but no..
Will deal with it in the morning.
Heddwch
G
Strange, good one moment, horrible the next, little stuff building..
Creak in the new bike today. Not under load, not out of the saddle, irregular, not a good creak sound.
Not doing smackdown was the correct call but brought up emotions and sadness esp with one of the people that liked syl's post about it on FB. Yeah yeah forget that place. I do, and then something like that sneaks in the periphery.
Actually thinking about the Freetown 50. Crazy? Yup. But there aren't any cx races close enough... And that just sounds fun. Also there's a Clydesdale category. Good for cx? Nope. Fun? Maybe.
Tired but not. Swyping instead of typing, typing is loud, swype is not...
Many feelings of failing lately, lost, rush from Sunday is gone.
Friday looking at the ride, well that is going to be a tough day, but don't really have a choice, can't not do it, can't/don't want to do it on the e bike. Cx bike? Yeah probably...
Hitting publish, should edit/read it but no..
Will deal with it in the morning.
Heddwch
G
Monday, August 26, 2019
That was fun
Like a lot of fun.
The MTB thing.
I felt pretty good on the bike - only issue was right hand cramping/being painful, but could be bars, or grips or something. Tweaked the angle on the bars - maybe fixed it?
Didn't realize I was going out with the A crew. Freddie, Burke and Syl. Comment from a friend: "Quick pace and lots of skill there" in that group I guess. True, they have all been riding at Big River forever. Freddie lives within riding distance (he rode there) and well the other two have been racing MTBs there and riding it for as long as I've known them. Me? First time there.
The bike is a HUGE difference. I got the tire pressure pretty damn close for a high pressure low accuracy guess at about 10-12 PSI. Basically went to 10 psi on the gauge and added a full stroke.
Climbs better than I do, but man I hit the pedals and the crank arms SO MANY TIMES. should have put those crank protectors on when it was new. But now they hide the damage. The pedals? well not in the best shape after that. Perhaps these need to go on the CX bike or something. Put a less expensive pedal on there. But I did get better at not wacking rocks. honestly if I had done a better job at that I would have come to a stop way few times, so there's something tangible to work on. Everything else felt great. Pointing the bike at the best line and ignoring the roots and shit was awesome. Impressive. Didn't even notice the bike weight. But I was trying to keep up to two much lighter guys with way lighter bikes. The strava ride titles from the three of them were pretty cool, made me feel not so much like a putz out there.
Yeah yeah - fine - I might actually be a better mt biker than i am a roadie - wait -that's not a surprise, but one of the new shop guys just thought I was a roadie with all my drop bar shit... i just correct him "I'm a cyclocrosser" even if that is probably less true. perhaps i am just a big dirt bag mtber. Kind of explains the whole affinity with Singlespeed.
The bike has 750 bars, soooo wide. A couple tree strikes with them but in a few spots with the dropper post down and flying through some twisty stuff I felt like I could have even gone wider.
Does the bike make the difference? Yeah. It makes it fun again. Like it used to be.
Right now I'm missing Kentaro. We did a lot of Mt biking before he left Michigan. I think I rode with him more than anyone else in '99/00. Wish i could ride with him again. Damn, not sure why my brain went there other than riding MTBs with him was legit fun and probably when I really last had a blast riding them. We'd meet up somewhere on my way home from CMU and ride the trails.
The anniversary of his death by Waste Management Truck right hook is coming up in a few days.
Somber twist...
Smackdown is tomorrow, but looking at this week, well - yesterday, not a big day but i felt it in my legs last night so probably best not to under-estimate recovery. Wed there's the start of Donny's mid-week CX in PVD (west side) but starts late and a long ride home from there. Thursday dirt smackdown. Friday the department retreat way out west. 35 miles, 8:30 start time. I really want to try and ride there and back. Because, well that's the tradition I have at these things and another tradition on that day. Gives me Saturday to recover for another Sunday MTB ride.
And i don't want to ride and not have fun. So fuck it. No smackdown. Might just show up for the start like last week and then head home. It worked well.
Been kind of hungry today. Mentioning the weight issue last week, well, after the riding and the eating - balloon! POOF heavy again. I think it has to be a bit of inflammation as well as just weight. I should get off the scale and just go by belly squishing. But should to it with a measuring device, not just finger pinch. Not going to change much, just try and, like today, be hungry a bit more. Scheduled a meeting at 11:30. By 11:10 I was ready to eat my lunch, but waited until after meeting. Hungry again but a handful of things to do before leaving, hopefully I can make it home without more calorie intake. Tough to balance physiological need and cravings and recovery and weightloss, esp as I get close to that mid-century mark. I'm old. And getting older.
But hey, it beats the alternative.
Read another good book this weekend. Actually read a couple over the last week - First was Throne of Glass by Sarah J Maas. A bit magic and fantasy and all that, but good, have book 2 in the series on hold, waiting. The one I just finished yesterday, a recent release. Pretty good, a nice twist and great storyline, fun read: Ancestral Night by Elizabeth Bear. Started listening to The Fallen by Baldacci last weekend. Not quite done with it but getting really close. Is it good? yeah, formulaic, predictable, complex but not unimaginably, well researched and plausible enough... great like the others? No. very much pulpy, but hey - mysteries are fun at times and a better escape than some really mentally headwringing deep shit. But I guess, I do prefer and like space operas best, like Ancestral Night.
Soon I can leave, go grab a few things at the grocery store and ride home. This is probably one of the lightest weeks here but still busy and plenty to do. Still haven't gotten the garbage disposal, maybe I can get that done tomorrow... like i wrote last time -6 yrs ago- the trashcan is def wetter and stinkier w/o the disposal working.
Can't wait to ride the MTB again, kind of wish there were more trails between here and home, but maybe there are enough to justify it... hmmm...
heddwch
G
The MTB thing.
I felt pretty good on the bike - only issue was right hand cramping/being painful, but could be bars, or grips or something. Tweaked the angle on the bars - maybe fixed it?
Didn't realize I was going out with the A crew. Freddie, Burke and Syl. Comment from a friend: "Quick pace and lots of skill there" in that group I guess. True, they have all been riding at Big River forever. Freddie lives within riding distance (he rode there) and well the other two have been racing MTBs there and riding it for as long as I've known them. Me? First time there.
The bike is a HUGE difference. I got the tire pressure pretty damn close for a high pressure low accuracy guess at about 10-12 PSI. Basically went to 10 psi on the gauge and added a full stroke.
Climbs better than I do, but man I hit the pedals and the crank arms SO MANY TIMES. should have put those crank protectors on when it was new. But now they hide the damage. The pedals? well not in the best shape after that. Perhaps these need to go on the CX bike or something. Put a less expensive pedal on there. But I did get better at not wacking rocks. honestly if I had done a better job at that I would have come to a stop way few times, so there's something tangible to work on. Everything else felt great. Pointing the bike at the best line and ignoring the roots and shit was awesome. Impressive. Didn't even notice the bike weight. But I was trying to keep up to two much lighter guys with way lighter bikes. The strava ride titles from the three of them were pretty cool, made me feel not so much like a putz out there.
Yeah yeah - fine - I might actually be a better mt biker than i am a roadie - wait -that's not a surprise, but one of the new shop guys just thought I was a roadie with all my drop bar shit... i just correct him "I'm a cyclocrosser" even if that is probably less true. perhaps i am just a big dirt bag mtber. Kind of explains the whole affinity with Singlespeed.
The bike has 750 bars, soooo wide. A couple tree strikes with them but in a few spots with the dropper post down and flying through some twisty stuff I felt like I could have even gone wider.
Does the bike make the difference? Yeah. It makes it fun again. Like it used to be.
Right now I'm missing Kentaro. We did a lot of Mt biking before he left Michigan. I think I rode with him more than anyone else in '99/00. Wish i could ride with him again. Damn, not sure why my brain went there other than riding MTBs with him was legit fun and probably when I really last had a blast riding them. We'd meet up somewhere on my way home from CMU and ride the trails.
The anniversary of his death by Waste Management Truck right hook is coming up in a few days.
Somber twist...
Smackdown is tomorrow, but looking at this week, well - yesterday, not a big day but i felt it in my legs last night so probably best not to under-estimate recovery. Wed there's the start of Donny's mid-week CX in PVD (west side) but starts late and a long ride home from there. Thursday dirt smackdown. Friday the department retreat way out west. 35 miles, 8:30 start time. I really want to try and ride there and back. Because, well that's the tradition I have at these things and another tradition on that day. Gives me Saturday to recover for another Sunday MTB ride.
And i don't want to ride and not have fun. So fuck it. No smackdown. Might just show up for the start like last week and then head home. It worked well.
Been kind of hungry today. Mentioning the weight issue last week, well, after the riding and the eating - balloon! POOF heavy again. I think it has to be a bit of inflammation as well as just weight. I should get off the scale and just go by belly squishing. But should to it with a measuring device, not just finger pinch. Not going to change much, just try and, like today, be hungry a bit more. Scheduled a meeting at 11:30. By 11:10 I was ready to eat my lunch, but waited until after meeting. Hungry again but a handful of things to do before leaving, hopefully I can make it home without more calorie intake. Tough to balance physiological need and cravings and recovery and weightloss, esp as I get close to that mid-century mark. I'm old. And getting older.
But hey, it beats the alternative.
Read another good book this weekend. Actually read a couple over the last week - First was Throne of Glass by Sarah J Maas. A bit magic and fantasy and all that, but good, have book 2 in the series on hold, waiting. The one I just finished yesterday, a recent release. Pretty good, a nice twist and great storyline, fun read: Ancestral Night by Elizabeth Bear. Started listening to The Fallen by Baldacci last weekend. Not quite done with it but getting really close. Is it good? yeah, formulaic, predictable, complex but not unimaginably, well researched and plausible enough... great like the others? No. very much pulpy, but hey - mysteries are fun at times and a better escape than some really mentally headwringing deep shit. But I guess, I do prefer and like space operas best, like Ancestral Night.
Soon I can leave, go grab a few things at the grocery store and ride home. This is probably one of the lightest weeks here but still busy and plenty to do. Still haven't gotten the garbage disposal, maybe I can get that done tomorrow... like i wrote last time -6 yrs ago- the trashcan is def wetter and stinkier w/o the disposal working.
Can't wait to ride the MTB again, kind of wish there were more trails between here and home, but maybe there are enough to justify it... hmmm...
heddwch
G
Wednesday, August 21, 2019
Time for something different
Rode the new bike yesterday. Did not do smackdown. Rolled with them down Waterfront Drive with the big wheels but that's it. It takes a bit of work to keep that thing going.
Def high force. Fit is on the money. Ordered new grips, hopefully they'll get here by the weekend but if not, i guess I can do one ride with undersized handle grabby things.
That's the bike. I like it.
Fun. And def huge, but doesn't look odd.
Heading out in a few minutes to do the Rooster Ronde Redux Part Deux with VeloCB.
Not riding this bike - tempting but yesterday kind of confirmed. I have a bike that is better suited to the ride than this one.
Would be fun to have this on those trail sections but also, the whole point of the ride is CXy time. Have to sort out the new tires anyway.
Time to sunscreen up and roll out. Fueled by Donuts today. Perhaps taking the fueling change to an extreme but fuck it - moderation is dumb. Yesterday i hit the scales in the morning at 211, lightest i've seen in maybe 2+ years? not sure but trend is good. But it also could be trending that way because I cut back the intensity and inflammation is down and other factors. Ate a lot yesterday and was back to 215 this morning. But hey what's a couple pounds when you're a clydesdale anyway?
Time to slather on the blue lizard (sensitive - just mechanical block with an all day base).
heddwch
G
Def high force. Fit is on the money. Ordered new grips, hopefully they'll get here by the weekend but if not, i guess I can do one ride with undersized handle grabby things.
Fun. And def huge, but doesn't look odd.
Heading out in a few minutes to do the Rooster Ronde Redux Part Deux with VeloCB.
Not riding this bike - tempting but yesterday kind of confirmed. I have a bike that is better suited to the ride than this one.
Would be fun to have this on those trail sections but also, the whole point of the ride is CXy time. Have to sort out the new tires anyway.
Time to sunscreen up and roll out. Fueled by Donuts today. Perhaps taking the fueling change to an extreme but fuck it - moderation is dumb. Yesterday i hit the scales in the morning at 211, lightest i've seen in maybe 2+ years? not sure but trend is good. But it also could be trending that way because I cut back the intensity and inflammation is down and other factors. Ate a lot yesterday and was back to 215 this morning. But hey what's a couple pounds when you're a clydesdale anyway?
Time to slather on the blue lizard (sensitive - just mechanical block with an all day base).
heddwch
G
Monday, August 19, 2019
Use the wrench on the bottom to turn it
Huh? What wrench where?
Garbage disposal.
I grew up w/o one and for a month or so in the summer of '13 we were w/o one here too. As mentioned the GD has been not working.
Timing was such that I could get to it this morning. Drop kid off for 5k pre-season erg test, head home. Was going to see what I could see with it maybe make it work.
Fun shit. Took it off - looks like some wood like fibers jammed around inside the spinny part. This one has more of a cup and blades and small holes along the edges instead of the big teeth and the one screen on the side. Supposed to be quieter and better or something (also more money). There's a big 3 year warranty label on the side. Couldn't remember when I got it. So what did I do?
Checked the archives. http://www.gewilli.com/2013/08/weekend-saga.html
oh.. 2013... the best and the worst year. Thanks life.
So now I'm dripping sweat (AC is on but still it is fucking summer and humid and while it is way nicer inside than outside it still sucks).
My hands smell like dirty kitchen plumbing (almost as bad as bathroom), I'm dripping sweat and the GD still doesn't work.
Brother said turn the wrench on the bottom when it gets jammed, you know the one you tape to the side? Well i had it and hadn't tried that. Ooh fuck there's some serious resistance here. Damn.
Turning turning, was able to make the visible wood fibers move around but I think there's probably more shit jammed along inside the wall of it. May just do the "HEY DON'T USE CHEMICALS IN HERE" as a maybe it'll soften dissolve it and I don't have to go get a new one.
Bike is here - got text this morning, UPS showed up before the shop opened, Matt D was there to receive it. Looks like shimano stuff is here too. Half tempted to drive everywhere.
Adding a bit of fun to my bad timing: Tax free weekend in Mass was this past weekend. Yup, funny timing that, eh?
Bit of a brain storm - what about that local appliance store that crushed the pricing on the new stove... holy crap their web page has way more selection AND better pricing and maybe there's something there that is good, AND while i'm sure the owners are big rich jackasses, they are our local ones and that's better right? And in RI so tax free? Pfft - who needs a 6% sale anyway when it is way cheaper than that to go to this place.
Anyway - maybe I should just take this dead one back to the big orange home improvement store and return/exchange it...
Actually thinking I'll bring the impact driver home after putting the bike together and just spin the drain with that. There's a 13mm nut holding the thing in place. If that doesn't work then the impact wrench should be able to take it off and if it is loose I should be able to free it all up and then determine if the motor is fucked or not.
BUT NEW BIKE IS HERE (and weather is muggy and f'n steaming hot - hey it is August DUH)... Smackdown or Dirty smackdown? I dunno we'll see what happens.
Enough sitting and pounding keyboard on the tablet thinking. But this was good - lead me to the S&W page and potentially a much better solution for less money.
Also the kitchen counter needs to be replaced. THe particle boar shit is falling apart behind the sink and raining bits down. I should look at finding a bit for it - maybe little brother has an idea where I could get a fancy scrap long enough that i can easily put a sink hole in.
And yeah - looking at that 2013 post. The fence still needs to be replaced. But it is held together with stakes and bracing now. Maybe not lasting another 6 years, but new bike def more joy than new fence...
NO MORE WRITING
heddwch
G
Garbage disposal.
I grew up w/o one and for a month or so in the summer of '13 we were w/o one here too. As mentioned the GD has been not working.
Timing was such that I could get to it this morning. Drop kid off for 5k pre-season erg test, head home. Was going to see what I could see with it maybe make it work.
Fun shit. Took it off - looks like some wood like fibers jammed around inside the spinny part. This one has more of a cup and blades and small holes along the edges instead of the big teeth and the one screen on the side. Supposed to be quieter and better or something (also more money). There's a big 3 year warranty label on the side. Couldn't remember when I got it. So what did I do?
Checked the archives. http://www.gewilli.com/2013/08/weekend-saga.html
oh.. 2013... the best and the worst year. Thanks life.
So now I'm dripping sweat (AC is on but still it is fucking summer and humid and while it is way nicer inside than outside it still sucks).
My hands smell like dirty kitchen plumbing (almost as bad as bathroom), I'm dripping sweat and the GD still doesn't work.
Brother said turn the wrench on the bottom when it gets jammed, you know the one you tape to the side? Well i had it and hadn't tried that. Ooh fuck there's some serious resistance here. Damn.
Turning turning, was able to make the visible wood fibers move around but I think there's probably more shit jammed along inside the wall of it. May just do the "HEY DON'T USE CHEMICALS IN HERE" as a maybe it'll soften dissolve it and I don't have to go get a new one.
Bike is here - got text this morning, UPS showed up before the shop opened, Matt D was there to receive it. Looks like shimano stuff is here too. Half tempted to drive everywhere.
Adding a bit of fun to my bad timing: Tax free weekend in Mass was this past weekend. Yup, funny timing that, eh?
Bit of a brain storm - what about that local appliance store that crushed the pricing on the new stove... holy crap their web page has way more selection AND better pricing and maybe there's something there that is good, AND while i'm sure the owners are big rich jackasses, they are our local ones and that's better right? And in RI so tax free? Pfft - who needs a 6% sale anyway when it is way cheaper than that to go to this place.
Anyway - maybe I should just take this dead one back to the big orange home improvement store and return/exchange it...
Actually thinking I'll bring the impact driver home after putting the bike together and just spin the drain with that. There's a 13mm nut holding the thing in place. If that doesn't work then the impact wrench should be able to take it off and if it is loose I should be able to free it all up and then determine if the motor is fucked or not.
BUT NEW BIKE IS HERE (and weather is muggy and f'n steaming hot - hey it is August DUH)... Smackdown or Dirty smackdown? I dunno we'll see what happens.
Enough sitting and pounding keyboard on the tablet thinking. But this was good - lead me to the S&W page and potentially a much better solution for less money.
Also the kitchen counter needs to be replaced. THe particle boar shit is falling apart behind the sink and raining bits down. I should look at finding a bit for it - maybe little brother has an idea where I could get a fancy scrap long enough that i can easily put a sink hole in.
And yeah - looking at that 2013 post. The fence still needs to be replaced. But it is held together with stakes and bracing now. Maybe not lasting another 6 years, but new bike def more joy than new fence...
NO MORE WRITING
heddwch
G
Friday, August 16, 2019
waiting is the hardest part
MORE WAITING
didn't show up today - gonna be here monday, at least that is when the crank will be here and well - guess i'll install em all at the same time... on monday...
gonna be normal weekend i guess - more time to work to pay for the bike before I start riding it...
guess I'd better switch those tires on the Crockett tonight and get ready for all day dirt next week.
heddwch
G
didn't show up today - gonna be here monday, at least that is when the crank will be here and well - guess i'll install em all at the same time... on monday...
gonna be normal weekend i guess - more time to work to pay for the bike before I start riding it...
guess I'd better switch those tires on the Crockett tonight and get ready for all day dirt next week.
heddwch
G
Tuesday, August 13, 2019
Pulled the M'Fn trigger
GeWilli will soon NOT be the only cyclist who really likes to ride on trails and in the dirt w/o a modern MTB...
Yup - just pulled the trigger on a bike...
Terrifying yet also super exciting.
Of course the "Get the bike but you now have to have someone look at the van and see what it needs to make it before getting a new car."
New car terror - and if getting a new bike is an anxious disaster for me.... take it to another level with the car. Maybe the van is totally fixable. But I'll tackle that soon enough. One thing at a time I guess.
Anyway, SUPER stoked.
Looking forward to hitting some dirt on something other than a CX bike.
Okay, now where the fuck am I gonna put THIS bike.
Anyone wanna bike an E-bike? Maybe I should just leave that thing at the shop... Gonna need the saddle off it...
I wonder how well the Joe Blow Pro X will do at inflating those things (not great I'm guessing - but I do have that compressor now).
Just got interrupted to be told that my snaking of the bathtub drain did nothing to help the bathtub drain (i snaked all the way to the black iron standing pipe). Of course I have to learn the lesson each time. I have to snake the SINK drain (they meet about 2' away from the big black pipe) or the tub won't drain.
Of course perhaps it always works out that way because I snake the tub and maybe push the blockage over into the sink's drain and then nothing drains but well now it actually seems to drain. And I get to wait until the under-cabinet dries off before piling all the stuff back in there.
They have the bike in the New Jersey warehouse, there's a decent chance it'll get here by the weekend. We'll see. I'm also curious to see how big the goddamn box is going to be. Also wondering if the crank will get here (has to come all the way from NC) in time too. Or maybe i just have to suffer through the short arms (although would be better to be able to take the crank and BB off and sell it as a unit - or keep them and put em back on if I sell this - TBD).
Gonna wrap this up and do the rest of the wrapping the kitchen up for the evening that I didn't do while dealing with plumbing fun.
heddwch
G
Yup - just pulled the trigger on a bike...
Terrifying yet also super exciting.
Of course the "Get the bike but you now have to have someone look at the van and see what it needs to make it before getting a new car."
New car terror - and if getting a new bike is an anxious disaster for me.... take it to another level with the car. Maybe the van is totally fixable. But I'll tackle that soon enough. One thing at a time I guess.
Anyway, SUPER stoked.
Looking forward to hitting some dirt on something other than a CX bike.
Okay, now where the fuck am I gonna put THIS bike.
Anyone wanna bike an E-bike? Maybe I should just leave that thing at the shop... Gonna need the saddle off it...
I wonder how well the Joe Blow Pro X will do at inflating those things (not great I'm guessing - but I do have that compressor now).
Just got interrupted to be told that my snaking of the bathtub drain did nothing to help the bathtub drain (i snaked all the way to the black iron standing pipe). Of course I have to learn the lesson each time. I have to snake the SINK drain (they meet about 2' away from the big black pipe) or the tub won't drain.
Of course perhaps it always works out that way because I snake the tub and maybe push the blockage over into the sink's drain and then nothing drains but well now it actually seems to drain. And I get to wait until the under-cabinet dries off before piling all the stuff back in there.
They have the bike in the New Jersey warehouse, there's a decent chance it'll get here by the weekend. We'll see. I'm also curious to see how big the goddamn box is going to be. Also wondering if the crank will get here (has to come all the way from NC) in time too. Or maybe i just have to suffer through the short arms (although would be better to be able to take the crank and BB off and sell it as a unit - or keep them and put em back on if I sell this - TBD).
Gonna wrap this up and do the rest of the wrapping the kitchen up for the evening that I didn't do while dealing with plumbing fun.
heddwch
G
curious realization
This whole process of weight stagnation and fueling challenges and trying to go faster has resulted in a bit of a challenge.
A bit of added science by Kolie driven by a podcast and a link got me thinking. And then trying.
And then realizing. All that beer i was pouring into myself was a pretty solid 'sugar' boost and why I was never successful at quitting without cravings until I switched to vodka and no beer - dropping the beer carbs but keeping the ETOH.
Point being metabolic sloth. It is awesome to have the engine running insanely efficiently for a long all day Hundo or 210 mile gravel ride. BUT... it doesn't bode well for CX or going fast or cranking the metabolism.
So trying a bit of an experiment by adding a few more specifically timed carbs to the system. Morning/breakfast. No longer just the days before hard efforts like Smackdown and TT, but each day. Second, a late dose of sugar/ice cream if dinner wasn't a pasta/rice thing.
is it working? I don't fucking know. I'm still working on making sure I'm topped up for intensity, eating real food, and minimizing excessive stuff. BUT i think i might be? let me get through the rest week - then move on to trying it out more but the idea that most of my personal philosophy has always had that liquid caloric offset going on is something even after a year and two months I need to tweak. Maybe working on this will help with CX season a bit.
Now...
yeah that contemplation about the MTB....
if you've read this at all you probably picked up on the fact that I overthink absolutely EVERYTHING. And I have an absolute aversion to spending money, fix/make due/anything before the outlay of cash. It isn't always a good trait. But the overthinking means yeah I do kind of run everything down from top to bottom, backwards and forwards.
Okay not everything. Somethings I'm inexplicably irrational about, that whole dichotomy of personality? I dunno.
But buying a new bike. That's kind of one of the things that falls into the overthink excessively reluctantly pursuing... vs the irrational just do it.
I've spend the last weekend looking first at all the road options and what's there. Ultimate conclusion that i should get the Mad One SL 6 disc because the added value of the aesthetics of the SLR 6 disc just aren't there and besides I still have to buy a Dura-Ace crank for it. And even with the bro deal that's an enormous pile of cash. And really - will it bring me joy? Or will is firmly and undeniably confirm that it really isn't about the bike. That all too real possibility certainly would suck the joy out of that purchase.
But a MTB... If I look at my cycling twitter friends I know IRL, and those IRL friends on FB or just IRL they've almost all gone more MTB than road lately (last 5-10 years) sure most still do the road and there are a couple who haven't but... they all ride, a lot. Not that far from here.
Back in 06-10 I spent a lot of time riding the MTB - the ones I have (yeah they are more than 20 years old) and while not, unfun, they were more frustrating on the trails here than they were fun. Sure the Adroit is perfect for fast buff smooth flowy single track. Kind of anywhere the CX bike is good, but thats very little of the MTB here locally. some trails are fine but most aren't. Nature of the local nature.
Would a new MTB bring me joy. I feel pretty confident it would. Now can I decide what is the best choice? No. But I can make a guess. And if I'm wrong I should be able to unload it in a year and get something better/different.
But it is CX season. Yes. First race looks to be Sept 8th. A good bit of single speed racing on my new Crockett. Well not that new - got it what two years ago? Yeah. Got new wheels for it in May. So adding another big bike purchase feels fundamentally extravagant but also still pretty conservative for someone who's life pretty much is bikes bikes bikes bikes. And the lack of a modern MTB is a big hole in the "quiver" And yeah it means Fleet week might turn into Fleet Fortnight but still...
Talking to people, real ones, that I know and trust and one says absolutely fucking to go for it. No one is abjectly against it. Okay one says the Stache is an absolute dog and i should get something else. But trust me... I've weighed all the options in the acceptable price range. It is narrowed down and now I have to find the courage to pull the trigger - maybe the last bit of validation to quench the nagging anxiety of such a big move.
Okay - enough mental verbal hand-wringing.
I also kind of have an urge to sit on the SEM and image stuff but I didn't find anything here that I wanted to look at. And this reminds me of the duckweed along the bike path I've been meaning to collect and prep and look at (they have super cool biofilms on the underside of the floating leaves). When i hit publish I'm going to get a few sample containers and put them in the bag for the ride home!
heddwch
G
A bit of added science by Kolie driven by a podcast and a link got me thinking. And then trying.
And then realizing. All that beer i was pouring into myself was a pretty solid 'sugar' boost and why I was never successful at quitting without cravings until I switched to vodka and no beer - dropping the beer carbs but keeping the ETOH.
Point being metabolic sloth. It is awesome to have the engine running insanely efficiently for a long all day Hundo or 210 mile gravel ride. BUT... it doesn't bode well for CX or going fast or cranking the metabolism.
So trying a bit of an experiment by adding a few more specifically timed carbs to the system. Morning/breakfast. No longer just the days before hard efforts like Smackdown and TT, but each day. Second, a late dose of sugar/ice cream if dinner wasn't a pasta/rice thing.
is it working? I don't fucking know. I'm still working on making sure I'm topped up for intensity, eating real food, and minimizing excessive stuff. BUT i think i might be? let me get through the rest week - then move on to trying it out more but the idea that most of my personal philosophy has always had that liquid caloric offset going on is something even after a year and two months I need to tweak. Maybe working on this will help with CX season a bit.
Now...
yeah that contemplation about the MTB....
if you've read this at all you probably picked up on the fact that I overthink absolutely EVERYTHING. And I have an absolute aversion to spending money, fix/make due/anything before the outlay of cash. It isn't always a good trait. But the overthinking means yeah I do kind of run everything down from top to bottom, backwards and forwards.
Okay not everything. Somethings I'm inexplicably irrational about, that whole dichotomy of personality? I dunno.
But buying a new bike. That's kind of one of the things that falls into the overthink excessively reluctantly pursuing... vs the irrational just do it.
I've spend the last weekend looking first at all the road options and what's there. Ultimate conclusion that i should get the Mad One SL 6 disc because the added value of the aesthetics of the SLR 6 disc just aren't there and besides I still have to buy a Dura-Ace crank for it. And even with the bro deal that's an enormous pile of cash. And really - will it bring me joy? Or will is firmly and undeniably confirm that it really isn't about the bike. That all too real possibility certainly would suck the joy out of that purchase.
But a MTB... If I look at my cycling twitter friends I know IRL, and those IRL friends on FB or just IRL they've almost all gone more MTB than road lately (last 5-10 years) sure most still do the road and there are a couple who haven't but... they all ride, a lot. Not that far from here.
Back in 06-10 I spent a lot of time riding the MTB - the ones I have (yeah they are more than 20 years old) and while not, unfun, they were more frustrating on the trails here than they were fun. Sure the Adroit is perfect for fast buff smooth flowy single track. Kind of anywhere the CX bike is good, but thats very little of the MTB here locally. some trails are fine but most aren't. Nature of the local nature.
Would a new MTB bring me joy. I feel pretty confident it would. Now can I decide what is the best choice? No. But I can make a guess. And if I'm wrong I should be able to unload it in a year and get something better/different.
But it is CX season. Yes. First race looks to be Sept 8th. A good bit of single speed racing on my new Crockett. Well not that new - got it what two years ago? Yeah. Got new wheels for it in May. So adding another big bike purchase feels fundamentally extravagant but also still pretty conservative for someone who's life pretty much is bikes bikes bikes bikes. And the lack of a modern MTB is a big hole in the "quiver" And yeah it means Fleet week might turn into Fleet Fortnight but still...
Talking to people, real ones, that I know and trust and one says absolutely fucking to go for it. No one is abjectly against it. Okay one says the Stache is an absolute dog and i should get something else. But trust me... I've weighed all the options in the acceptable price range. It is narrowed down and now I have to find the courage to pull the trigger - maybe the last bit of validation to quench the nagging anxiety of such a big move.
Okay - enough mental verbal hand-wringing.
I also kind of have an urge to sit on the SEM and image stuff but I didn't find anything here that I wanted to look at. And this reminds me of the duckweed along the bike path I've been meaning to collect and prep and look at (they have super cool biofilms on the underside of the floating leaves). When i hit publish I'm going to get a few sample containers and put them in the bag for the ride home!
heddwch
G
Sunday, August 11, 2019
Morning musings
Maybe I need a new MTB, forget the roadie shit and just get dirty again. Get a bike I can have fun with on the local tails. Bonus a mid price point hard tail is waaaaaay cheaper than a Madone... Hmmm
Yesterday I wasted a bunch of time at the bike shop, instead of putting bikes together i was digging through the Ninja (EP) page and looking at Madones.
SL 6 is still a ton of $$ but i can get it at a crazy discount, but it has shitty wheels and the oddly out of place normal bar and stem instead of the cool aero one. And it is the heavy frame not the SLR.
The SLR 6 is a $1200 more...
AND i'd have to spend some serious $$ and get a Dura-Ace crankset (180s bro).
So like that's a SHIT ton pile of money. And I'm not going to ride it much between now and the spring. Maybe once a week, if that, once CX starts. AND I'll need the 62cm size and THAT limits availability and selection significantly. They make like 5 of those a year. Okay maybe they make 20 total globally. Seriously. NOT. THAT. MANY.
Klein only ever made 5 63cm bike a year in my size, and that was after production scaled up with the Trek buyout.
Freak size frames aren't even made in quantities.
BUT then idiot sceming brain started thinking about Mt Bikes. Like the preamble i started with (it was a text draft to CF but figured to expand and write while finishing coffee before heading to the shop).
I could go with a nice 29+ wheel bike. Like BIG WHEELS MOTHERFUCKER, modern fork, and hell the XT 180s are cheap and they work, and be ready for either SS MTB or gears if i got the Stache 5 or 7. Not sure the 21.5 is big enough but... not much choice, it isn't made any bigger. That's kind of the scary part, is it going to be big enough. Probably. Also, dropper post? WUT? me? nooooo that's crazy talk. No excuse NOT To sign up for 24HOGG in the Solo category. Fuck this going fast roadie shit. TTs are for triathletes, smackdown is for crit junkies and fast skinny kids. I'm a dirt bag CXer at heart right?
Maybe that's the direction i need to go in. I like riding in the dirt, I like doing it on the CX bike but most of the trails here are not suitable for that kind of shit, need a MTB... Now a full squish super bike would be fun but big fat tubeless 29+ wheels and a functional front fork should be good enough right?
Still a good pile of cash for one but then again, suuuuuuper steeply discounted. And maybe i start doing the normal industry bro thing and buy a bike then sell it and get a new one after a year or two. Maybe stop being the end of the line for bikes and be the first stop. plus side to doing that with MTB shit is the 21.5 fits a larger range of people than a 62 Mad One. (yes, I am officially calling the Madone a Mad One from here on out forever).
I'm still going to enforce the rest day protocol today - only riding to work and then I'm only riding the eBike. And That's another ball of wax. Ain't no Crossrip in the line up for 2020. They added an extra Domane. So the only two drop bar ebikes are road, not commuters. And none of the rest of the commuter line up come in 700c wheels. We'll see what happens. Maybe I won't be plowing the bike path this year. Anyone want a 58cm Crossrip+? well cared for. It is a GREAT f'n bike for commuting, but when you're given a demo one to ride, well it won't last and the shop needs to sell it. First $2800 can take it home.
I just peeked at the calendar for this week. Oops, I did it again. Overbooked myself. Probably going to replace the garbage disposal instead of smackdown on Tuesday (could do it today but that whole needing to go to work thing).
Maybe the following week I should block a day off and just ride CX bikes.
okay - getting late - burning daylight writing - putting the tablet away
heddwch
G
Yesterday I wasted a bunch of time at the bike shop, instead of putting bikes together i was digging through the Ninja (EP) page and looking at Madones.
SL 6 is still a ton of $$ but i can get it at a crazy discount, but it has shitty wheels and the oddly out of place normal bar and stem instead of the cool aero one. And it is the heavy frame not the SLR.
The SLR 6 is a $1200 more...
AND i'd have to spend some serious $$ and get a Dura-Ace crankset (180s bro).
So like that's a SHIT ton pile of money. And I'm not going to ride it much between now and the spring. Maybe once a week, if that, once CX starts. AND I'll need the 62cm size and THAT limits availability and selection significantly. They make like 5 of those a year. Okay maybe they make 20 total globally. Seriously. NOT. THAT. MANY.
Klein only ever made 5 63cm bike a year in my size, and that was after production scaled up with the Trek buyout.
Freak size frames aren't even made in quantities.
BUT then idiot sceming brain started thinking about Mt Bikes. Like the preamble i started with (it was a text draft to CF but figured to expand and write while finishing coffee before heading to the shop).
I could go with a nice 29+ wheel bike. Like BIG WHEELS MOTHERFUCKER, modern fork, and hell the XT 180s are cheap and they work, and be ready for either SS MTB or gears if i got the Stache 5 or 7. Not sure the 21.5 is big enough but... not much choice, it isn't made any bigger. That's kind of the scary part, is it going to be big enough. Probably. Also, dropper post? WUT? me? nooooo that's crazy talk. No excuse NOT To sign up for 24HOGG in the Solo category. Fuck this going fast roadie shit. TTs are for triathletes, smackdown is for crit junkies and fast skinny kids. I'm a dirt bag CXer at heart right?
Maybe that's the direction i need to go in. I like riding in the dirt, I like doing it on the CX bike but most of the trails here are not suitable for that kind of shit, need a MTB... Now a full squish super bike would be fun but big fat tubeless 29+ wheels and a functional front fork should be good enough right?
Still a good pile of cash for one but then again, suuuuuuper steeply discounted. And maybe i start doing the normal industry bro thing and buy a bike then sell it and get a new one after a year or two. Maybe stop being the end of the line for bikes and be the first stop. plus side to doing that with MTB shit is the 21.5 fits a larger range of people than a 62 Mad One. (yes, I am officially calling the Madone a Mad One from here on out forever).
I'm still going to enforce the rest day protocol today - only riding to work and then I'm only riding the eBike. And That's another ball of wax. Ain't no Crossrip in the line up for 2020. They added an extra Domane. So the only two drop bar ebikes are road, not commuters. And none of the rest of the commuter line up come in 700c wheels. We'll see what happens. Maybe I won't be plowing the bike path this year. Anyone want a 58cm Crossrip+? well cared for. It is a GREAT f'n bike for commuting, but when you're given a demo one to ride, well it won't last and the shop needs to sell it. First $2800 can take it home.
I just peeked at the calendar for this week. Oops, I did it again. Overbooked myself. Probably going to replace the garbage disposal instead of smackdown on Tuesday (could do it today but that whole needing to go to work thing).
Maybe the following week I should block a day off and just ride CX bikes.
okay - getting late - burning daylight writing - putting the tablet away
heddwch
G
Friday, August 09, 2019
welp
That was the wrong direction.
The wind and my time. Felt like it might have been a tailwind. But nope.
Just under 22 officially.
Then couldn't freaking sleep at all. Eyes gluing shut but brain and body wired lying in bed. It was pretty surreal.
As much as I wanted to stick around for the results and the raffle - with as many people there - I left. Rode back with JC. Bailed on the ceremony.
And then there is the whole what is the Merckx category.
In my book:
Rims less than 35mm, no aero helmet, no aero bike, no aero bars.
Pretty simple. Skinsuit? fine. Shoe covers? Don't care.
Teardrop helmet? Nope.
Aero bike? Nope - even if it is the only bike you've got
Aero wheels? Nope - same - if the only wheels you own are carbon and deeper than 35 mm then you aren't in the category.
Did I care? yes. Does it matter? No.
Not my race series. I wasn't anywhere near contention for the series awards. So Fuck It.
I also think I need a rest week. Maybe work in a longer slow ride, not a no ride week but def maybe a break from intensity. I've been going Smackdown/TT for the last five weeks, sticking in some extra riding on the weekends. It has been a big week for me. Hills on Sunday, smackdown and then TT and it has been a rough week. I'm tired.
Shouldn't be maybe? But then life isn't cake and waffles like most of the fast people. Running 21 year old shit probably isn't doing me any favors. But it isn't about the bike.
We'll see how it shakes out. Def feeling like bailing on Tuesday next week. Def hanging up the Klein for the season. Maybe it is time to put the knobbies back on the Crockett and ride only that.
Someone pointed out how draining it is to do these kind of technical intense trainings all day. True, it is. They also mentioned how tough it is to just be the one who gives and gives and how nice it is to have someone to hang out with you can recharge from. the rest was redacted and placed in a draft
maybe if i start some running it will help.
not sure how it will but hey - good delusion to motivate for something that will make a difference in singlespeed CX
Gotta get through the rest of the month first.
The rest of the day before that.
Best to go back to it.
heddwch
G
Cue'n up another Amelie mix set to get through:
The wind and my time. Felt like it might have been a tailwind. But nope.
Just under 22 officially.
Then couldn't freaking sleep at all. Eyes gluing shut but brain and body wired lying in bed. It was pretty surreal.
As much as I wanted to stick around for the results and the raffle - with as many people there - I left. Rode back with JC. Bailed on the ceremony.
And then there is the whole what is the Merckx category.
In my book:
Rims less than 35mm, no aero helmet, no aero bike, no aero bars.
Pretty simple. Skinsuit? fine. Shoe covers? Don't care.
Teardrop helmet? Nope.
Aero bike? Nope - even if it is the only bike you've got
Aero wheels? Nope - same - if the only wheels you own are carbon and deeper than 35 mm then you aren't in the category.
Did I care? yes. Does it matter? No.
Not my race series. I wasn't anywhere near contention for the series awards. So Fuck It.
I also think I need a rest week. Maybe work in a longer slow ride, not a no ride week but def maybe a break from intensity. I've been going Smackdown/TT for the last five weeks, sticking in some extra riding on the weekends. It has been a big week for me. Hills on Sunday, smackdown and then TT and it has been a rough week. I'm tired.
Shouldn't be maybe? But then life isn't cake and waffles like most of the fast people. Running 21 year old shit probably isn't doing me any favors. But it isn't about the bike.
We'll see how it shakes out. Def feeling like bailing on Tuesday next week. Def hanging up the Klein for the season. Maybe it is time to put the knobbies back on the Crockett and ride only that.
Someone pointed out how draining it is to do these kind of technical intense trainings all day. True, it is. They also mentioned how tough it is to just be the one who gives and gives and how nice it is to have someone to hang out with you can recharge from. the rest was redacted and placed in a draft
maybe if i start some running it will help.
not sure how it will but hey - good delusion to motivate for something that will make a difference in singlespeed CX
Gotta get through the rest of the month first.
The rest of the day before that.
Best to go back to it.
heddwch
G
Cue'n up another Amelie mix set to get through:
Thursday, August 08, 2019
strangest TT series
Who has a TT rig that isn't ridden in the local TT series. Even if the rig is a semi-aero front wheel and a disc covered rear wheel and clip on bars on drops all attached to a 1986 steel bike?
Me.
I'm not optimistic about the numbers tonight, but I'll still cross the t's and dot the i's and see how it shakes out.
Had thought about driving there but not gonna do that. Will do the whole ride there and home thing. After I go home to get the bike and change.
Took the e-bike to work this morning. Mostly to facilitate getting here and home w/o totally killing my legs. Perhaps the added commute miles took a touch off for smackdown. Or not, probably not. Looking at the strava hr map - i was just too deep too long too early. Buh buy. And honestly, yes I talk too much about it, my weight being 15-20 pounds more than it was when i was fastest in '13 probably accounts for a good bit of the deviation, esp when factoring the wattage difference required. Even if I am pushing the same power - i am going slower.
So not as much power means even slower.
But if i can just hold the same time or go a little faster than last week, that'll be good enough. If I can break into the sub 21 mark? That would be ideal. We'll see how it shakes out.
Just ate a bit of food. Time to get on the bike and head home.
Hopefully a less rushed turn around there than on Tuesday.
thinking maybe early morning before work CX start drills at IPP
something like this: http://www.empiricalcycling.com/podcast-episodes/ten-minute-tips-1-training-for-cyclocross-season
possibly even use TIllinghast as the over under 2x20 course. Might have to figure out how to program the garmin to do the whole timing thing for me though.
Time to pedal. then race. Girls get home later tonight. Back to normal.
and life marches on...
heddwch
G
Me.
I'm not optimistic about the numbers tonight, but I'll still cross the t's and dot the i's and see how it shakes out.
Had thought about driving there but not gonna do that. Will do the whole ride there and home thing. After I go home to get the bike and change.
Took the e-bike to work this morning. Mostly to facilitate getting here and home w/o totally killing my legs. Perhaps the added commute miles took a touch off for smackdown. Or not, probably not. Looking at the strava hr map - i was just too deep too long too early. Buh buy. And honestly, yes I talk too much about it, my weight being 15-20 pounds more than it was when i was fastest in '13 probably accounts for a good bit of the deviation, esp when factoring the wattage difference required. Even if I am pushing the same power - i am going slower.
So not as much power means even slower.
But if i can just hold the same time or go a little faster than last week, that'll be good enough. If I can break into the sub 21 mark? That would be ideal. We'll see how it shakes out.
Just ate a bit of food. Time to get on the bike and head home.
Hopefully a less rushed turn around there than on Tuesday.
thinking maybe early morning before work CX start drills at IPP
something like this: http://www.empiricalcycling.com/podcast-episodes/ten-minute-tips-1-training-for-cyclocross-season
possibly even use TIllinghast as the over under 2x20 course. Might have to figure out how to program the garmin to do the whole timing thing for me though.
Time to pedal. then race. Girls get home later tonight. Back to normal.
and life marches on...
heddwch
G
Tuesday, August 06, 2019
weird
I thought the last one published at lunch. Perhaps not. oops
Well smackdown went predictably. Actually worse than usual, mostly because Leland went to the front and drilled it on Woodward, I hung on his wheel in 2nd, not a problem but a lot of work. We got to the farm, you know where those three little water main covers are that one of us (me) always nails perfectly, that place, a gap opened that I couldn't shut down. Just. couldn't. close. the. gap.
flicked elbow and jason john and justin came through, I tried to get on justin's wheel... I managed to do it but the timing was just at the little rise and the whole power to weight gods totally smacked me down and i just watched them ride off.
Not even close to contact at the turn at the end of prospect. So even FARTHER to ride alone than last week. Legs right now feel more jacked and sore and destroyed than they have in a long time. Good thing? Perhaps? Maybe it is because I came home, drank a protein shake (kid doesn't like it - someone's gotta use that expensive shit up before it goes bad) then warmed up some left over chili put my feet up and watched the last 2/3s of District 9 (the movie).
When i got up at the end there, oh man my legs, shredded.
No more TV tonight.
Riding around all I can think of is what is wrong, why am I so slow, would getting a coach help, no i don't have power, none of them can help w/o it anymore. Besides I know I need better stim and better recovery. Maybe I need to give up on Smackdown, say forget it. Stop trying. I'm not as fast as I was 5 years ago and at that point i was just barely able to hold on. I mean I was 15-20 pounds lighter 5 years ago, but mechanically and physically i'm holding together much better at this weight. I know I I can go down a little more in weight and the scale is ticking in the correct direction, a pound or so every week or three. or four, or not at all. skinny shorts are fitting a little better than they were a couple months ago so that's at least a positive sign. Can't help but wonder if there's some underlying physical issue beyond just getting old.
It is kind of depressing, not clinically, more of the disheartening/discouraging variety when I'm on the bike right now. and no the black blue wasn't any faster, perhaps even slower.
Not sure what's going to happen with the TT and my legs and brain.
Maybe I'll pull it together.
Managed to catch the timing just right and watched the kid's race. 3rd. Needed to be 2nd to move on to the finals, but they held off 4th and for having only been in the boat together for a couple weeks and being 3 years under the age cap for the U17 junior race, that's pretty fucking good. Super proud and stoked.
That is her mother in her, the athlete. I'm a mechanic. I take things apart and put them together and make them work. I can't go fast. That's not me. makes me doubt the whole racing thing. Rides like today, couldn't even make it home with any reasonable headway and I'm seriously wondering why bother, what's the point. Gotta give it at least another go.
Maybe the running will help, maybe i need to cut out the smackdown and do other more specific stuff with manageable expectations, intervals on my own, targeted parameters that don't involve trying to ride at a level I will never be able to sustain.
I dunno... i'll keep thinking about it but not doing what I need to do to actually do it. But maybe the shop is slowing early this year...
not terribly positive, so i'm going to have some of the ice cream i made last night (i'll make more tomorrow) and go to bed, hopefully the fireworks are over for the night, the dogs haven't liked them going off tonight.
heddwch
G
Well smackdown went predictably. Actually worse than usual, mostly because Leland went to the front and drilled it on Woodward, I hung on his wheel in 2nd, not a problem but a lot of work. We got to the farm, you know where those three little water main covers are that one of us (me) always nails perfectly, that place, a gap opened that I couldn't shut down. Just. couldn't. close. the. gap.
flicked elbow and jason john and justin came through, I tried to get on justin's wheel... I managed to do it but the timing was just at the little rise and the whole power to weight gods totally smacked me down and i just watched them ride off.
Not even close to contact at the turn at the end of prospect. So even FARTHER to ride alone than last week. Legs right now feel more jacked and sore and destroyed than they have in a long time. Good thing? Perhaps? Maybe it is because I came home, drank a protein shake (kid doesn't like it - someone's gotta use that expensive shit up before it goes bad) then warmed up some left over chili put my feet up and watched the last 2/3s of District 9 (the movie).
When i got up at the end there, oh man my legs, shredded.
No more TV tonight.
Riding around all I can think of is what is wrong, why am I so slow, would getting a coach help, no i don't have power, none of them can help w/o it anymore. Besides I know I need better stim and better recovery. Maybe I need to give up on Smackdown, say forget it. Stop trying. I'm not as fast as I was 5 years ago and at that point i was just barely able to hold on. I mean I was 15-20 pounds lighter 5 years ago, but mechanically and physically i'm holding together much better at this weight. I know I I can go down a little more in weight and the scale is ticking in the correct direction, a pound or so every week or three. or four, or not at all. skinny shorts are fitting a little better than they were a couple months ago so that's at least a positive sign. Can't help but wonder if there's some underlying physical issue beyond just getting old.
It is kind of depressing, not clinically, more of the disheartening/discouraging variety when I'm on the bike right now. and no the black blue wasn't any faster, perhaps even slower.
Not sure what's going to happen with the TT and my legs and brain.
Maybe I'll pull it together.
Managed to catch the timing just right and watched the kid's race. 3rd. Needed to be 2nd to move on to the finals, but they held off 4th and for having only been in the boat together for a couple weeks and being 3 years under the age cap for the U17 junior race, that's pretty fucking good. Super proud and stoked.
That is her mother in her, the athlete. I'm a mechanic. I take things apart and put them together and make them work. I can't go fast. That's not me. makes me doubt the whole racing thing. Rides like today, couldn't even make it home with any reasonable headway and I'm seriously wondering why bother, what's the point. Gotta give it at least another go.
Maybe the running will help, maybe i need to cut out the smackdown and do other more specific stuff with manageable expectations, intervals on my own, targeted parameters that don't involve trying to ride at a level I will never be able to sustain.
I dunno... i'll keep thinking about it but not doing what I need to do to actually do it. But maybe the shop is slowing early this year...
not terribly positive, so i'm going to have some of the ice cream i made last night (i'll make more tomorrow) and go to bed, hopefully the fireworks are over for the night, the dogs haven't liked them going off tonight.
heddwch
G
mini-break
or a house to my self couple of days...
family has all headed off to Canada eh?! St Catherine specifically. I guess there some big rowing boat race thing. I am hanging out with the dogs.
Down side was I delayed making dinner, I wasn't hungry yet, until I was hungry and dinner wasn't close to ready.
But I ate enough, had some for lunch and still managed to make Ice Cream (and ate a little before bed). Watched a movie on that prime thing on the tv thing, a movie i couldn't watch with everyone else. Me and the dogs. Hanging out.
Doing dishes, laundry, plenty of other shit to do. Should probably make a trip to the home improvement place and buy a new garbage disposal. I have the plumbing bits to remove it totally but seems people are way too used to having it and my suggestion of making that permanent was met with a flat out 'NO' sigh. Oh well.
Not tonight though - it is smackdown tonight. Already some arguments about moving it earlier. Seems there was an appreciably higher level of car traffic with a 5pm start than a 5:30 start. We'll do the 5pm today - if it is super shitty i guess we'll move it back. But being solo i gotta head home and let the dogs out before the ride. Means an extra 10 miles or so but hey, call it a warm up eh?
I need them warm up things. Although I think perhaps I need to NOT ride to the TT on thursday given the whole being at home alone thing and the timing. Dogs aren't keen on hanging out alone for 12 hours. Although they might be fine, it probably isn't best to push it.
Aired up the tires on the black blue yesterday. Felt a wee bit easier - but who knows if that's reality or not. Does it feel better? a little yeah. So back to smackdown on this thing. only one chain ring and all that.
Had a weird instance with Flickr on Friday - tried again today and it worked, but something was def hanging up on it but my account and the folks I follow over there are BACK. Sure, a bit stagnated but keeping that connection feels important in someways.
Big announcement today: https://www.olympus-lifescience.com/en/landing/ioty-2019/ so that should be fun, and since I'm a judge there's no pressure to submit or feel bad about not winning.
Submitting stuff to the image contest last year was pretty disappointing. Realizing it was a full on popularity contest and the winners were all local society folks kind of felt a bit unfair. They changed it for this year but I'm not at the meeting and didn't submit anything this year.
I managed to get out and do some hill repeats on Sunday morning before work. Funny, a hard ride in the morning negatively impacts my work productivity in the afternoon. Go figure. But the hills felt good. Did it on the Crockett, better gearing for the hills (kind of) and CX specific power. Don't want to do those too frequently but seemed pretty high on the effectiveness. After the TT series is over on Thursday i think I'll start sticking some running in. Need to start slow, short duration and high frequency until the muscle soreness fades a bit. Emphasis on the starting slow part.
Couple more things to do today - had some weird dreams, slept okay but not perfectly. Been honestly feeling a bit off in some ways, weird strange ones. Def in a weird space now.
Finished the book called The Feed https://www.amazon.com/dp/B071RQX5TL/ref=dp-kindle-redirect?_encoding=UTF8&btkr=1 uncomfortable but ultimately good. Nice tension, well developed story, a bit of a few plot twists and well crafted. Disturbing sort of but also good. I did listen to it and perhaps might be one of those if I was reading it i might not finish. Yeah I'm still trying to get through Virtual Light. No dice. Not engaged enough, probably need to audio those if I am going to make it through them. A bunch of books that I had on hold all got auto-checked out, so I need to read a bit to catch up. Probably better to do that than watch movies at home, but I can read when everyone is home and they are binge watching some reality TV (don't ask) there's something more relaxing about watching and letting the brain turn to mush for a bit than reading. Even if I'm reading while being in bed.
On the reading list now (aka checked out waiting for me to start/finish)
Dark Matter (Blake Crouch) Audio book
Throne of Glass (Sarah J Maes)
The Fallen (David Baldacci) (memory series book 4)
Virtual Light (Willam Gibson) *started - about halfway through maybe
Darkness Visible (William Styron) - rec from iworedettos - started page 1, it is short, but haven't made it further
okay - time to give some microscope instruction - lunch time (at my desk alone, eating and typing) is over.
Soundtrack for lunch has been:
heddwch
G
family has all headed off to Canada eh?! St Catherine specifically. I guess there some big rowing boat race thing. I am hanging out with the dogs.
Down side was I delayed making dinner, I wasn't hungry yet, until I was hungry and dinner wasn't close to ready.
But I ate enough, had some for lunch and still managed to make Ice Cream (and ate a little before bed). Watched a movie on that prime thing on the tv thing, a movie i couldn't watch with everyone else. Me and the dogs. Hanging out.
Doing dishes, laundry, plenty of other shit to do. Should probably make a trip to the home improvement place and buy a new garbage disposal. I have the plumbing bits to remove it totally but seems people are way too used to having it and my suggestion of making that permanent was met with a flat out 'NO' sigh. Oh well.
Not tonight though - it is smackdown tonight. Already some arguments about moving it earlier. Seems there was an appreciably higher level of car traffic with a 5pm start than a 5:30 start. We'll do the 5pm today - if it is super shitty i guess we'll move it back. But being solo i gotta head home and let the dogs out before the ride. Means an extra 10 miles or so but hey, call it a warm up eh?
I need them warm up things. Although I think perhaps I need to NOT ride to the TT on thursday given the whole being at home alone thing and the timing. Dogs aren't keen on hanging out alone for 12 hours. Although they might be fine, it probably isn't best to push it.
Aired up the tires on the black blue yesterday. Felt a wee bit easier - but who knows if that's reality or not. Does it feel better? a little yeah. So back to smackdown on this thing. only one chain ring and all that.
Had a weird instance with Flickr on Friday - tried again today and it worked, but something was def hanging up on it but my account and the folks I follow over there are BACK. Sure, a bit stagnated but keeping that connection feels important in someways.
Big announcement today: https://www.olympus-lifescience.com/en/landing/ioty-2019/ so that should be fun, and since I'm a judge there's no pressure to submit or feel bad about not winning.
Submitting stuff to the image contest last year was pretty disappointing. Realizing it was a full on popularity contest and the winners were all local society folks kind of felt a bit unfair. They changed it for this year but I'm not at the meeting and didn't submit anything this year.
I managed to get out and do some hill repeats on Sunday morning before work. Funny, a hard ride in the morning negatively impacts my work productivity in the afternoon. Go figure. But the hills felt good. Did it on the Crockett, better gearing for the hills (kind of) and CX specific power. Don't want to do those too frequently but seemed pretty high on the effectiveness. After the TT series is over on Thursday i think I'll start sticking some running in. Need to start slow, short duration and high frequency until the muscle soreness fades a bit. Emphasis on the starting slow part.
Couple more things to do today - had some weird dreams, slept okay but not perfectly. Been honestly feeling a bit off in some ways, weird strange ones. Def in a weird space now.
Finished the book called The Feed https://www.amazon.com/dp/B071RQX5TL/ref=dp-kindle-redirect?_encoding=UTF8&btkr=1 uncomfortable but ultimately good. Nice tension, well developed story, a bit of a few plot twists and well crafted. Disturbing sort of but also good. I did listen to it and perhaps might be one of those if I was reading it i might not finish. Yeah I'm still trying to get through Virtual Light. No dice. Not engaged enough, probably need to audio those if I am going to make it through them. A bunch of books that I had on hold all got auto-checked out, so I need to read a bit to catch up. Probably better to do that than watch movies at home, but I can read when everyone is home and they are binge watching some reality TV (don't ask) there's something more relaxing about watching and letting the brain turn to mush for a bit than reading. Even if I'm reading while being in bed.
On the reading list now (aka checked out waiting for me to start/finish)
Dark Matter (Blake Crouch) Audio book
Throne of Glass (Sarah J Maes)
The Fallen (David Baldacci) (memory series book 4)
Virtual Light (Willam Gibson) *started - about halfway through maybe
Darkness Visible (William Styron) - rec from iworedettos - started page 1, it is short, but haven't made it further
okay - time to give some microscope instruction - lunch time (at my desk alone, eating and typing) is over.
Soundtrack for lunch has been:
heddwch
G
Friday, August 02, 2019
sound track for yesterday and this morning
with a bonus video of some REALLY cool shit
soundtrack:
Video:
Vorticity 2 (4K) from Mike Olbinski on Vimeo.
heddwch
G
soundtrack:
Video:
Vorticity 2 (4K) from Mike Olbinski on Vimeo.
heddwch
G
Thursday, August 01, 2019
The TT... also DAMN GARMIN
JP's Garmin that I need to probably give back at some point and get my own, decided that rather than track my meandering early to get to the time trial and longer but not easy route to the start, and then all the warm up efforts it was just going to crow flies bee line it to the start. GREAT.
At least it captured the actual TT. And my slow but steady improvement. And yes, it was an improvement. Only a handful of seconds faster but I also didn't feel horrible riding home and unlike that first week and the second week, I can actual move and function now that I'm home. It is almost as if my body is kind of starting to figure out the go hard for a short time thing. A bit of a stomach/gut cramp before during the TT but nothing I couldn't ignore once I heard "GO"
Would my times be better if i was on the old Paramount in TT mode? Yup. But doesn't matter. What matters is that improvement. Maybe I can find 20 seconds next week. Can try right?
The sensations pedaling are much better. Not going a whole hell of a lot faster but I am not 100% totally fucking useless after as in right now.
But I am still tired- at least the kids made dinner so there was something yummy to eat when I got home that I didn't have to make. Now to put what I didn't eat away and get some rest.
Back to crazy tomorrow.
heddwch
G
mid-week weekend?
Kind of in a way.
I scheduled time to do a project that has been in the works for 2+ years. And that was it.
Nothing else.
Stopped by the shop on the way home, didn't even build any bikes. Just went home (weather was looking shitty - turned out it didn't even rain on us).
Was strange, feeling the lightness, relaxed, a freedom from that dark cloud.
Flip side of this - is a bit of a backlog, a log jam building up. But fuck it. I'll get to it when I get to it. everyone else seems to be taking two weeks off.
Yeah - i think i could actually take 3 weeks off, I have that much vacation time accumulated, not counting other time i can take off.
So - slipping into neutral, turning the engine off, feels good.
And not unjustified.
Time to play with an air compressor.
Felt like documenting a good feeling.
TT tonight - maybe this lightness in heart and mind will translate into faster pedaling.
One thing I am doing differently. I'm riding to the start myself. Getting dropped on the way there is mentally bad. Might take the long way to get there. Backpack makes it less aero on the way but means I don't have to head back to the office on the way home. Worth it.
heddwch
G
I scheduled time to do a project that has been in the works for 2+ years. And that was it.
Nothing else.
Stopped by the shop on the way home, didn't even build any bikes. Just went home (weather was looking shitty - turned out it didn't even rain on us).
Was strange, feeling the lightness, relaxed, a freedom from that dark cloud.
Flip side of this - is a bit of a backlog, a log jam building up. But fuck it. I'll get to it when I get to it. everyone else seems to be taking two weeks off.
Yeah - i think i could actually take 3 weeks off, I have that much vacation time accumulated, not counting other time i can take off.
So - slipping into neutral, turning the engine off, feels good.
And not unjustified.
Time to play with an air compressor.
Felt like documenting a good feeling.
TT tonight - maybe this lightness in heart and mind will translate into faster pedaling.
One thing I am doing differently. I'm riding to the start myself. Getting dropped on the way there is mentally bad. Might take the long way to get there. Backpack makes it less aero on the way but means I don't have to head back to the office on the way home. Worth it.
heddwch
G
Tuesday, July 30, 2019
also - you should be reading AHTBM
https://allhailtheblackmarket.com/2019/07/lifes-funny-sometimes/
i don't know what's going on but he's letting bits slip here and there enough that I kind of do now...
but still don't and yet find I'm feeling the same way about things he expresses here in that latest post...
i don't know what's going on but he's letting bits slip here and there enough that I kind of do now...
but still don't and yet find I'm feeling the same way about things he expresses here in that latest post...
More reading - two interlinked but unrelated articles
This morning over coffee - actually clicked on it by randomly looking at Google's suggestions for me on the phone, it was down at the bottom, I missed it yesterday I guess, thought it was an old article, but no, published yesterday.
https://www.washingtonpost.com/sports/2019/07/29/kelly-catlin-death-cyclist/
this phrase caught me a bit off guard, like I mentioned on Twitter this morning:
But there was much more serious depth given than any other previous story about Kelly.
Also checked out a book recommended by iworedettos: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/249042.Darkness_Visible I haven't started reading it but it is lined up next in the cue.
Of course reading Baldacci's Memory Man series is probably messing with me more than distracting. But it is predictable and the social dysfunction and his memory is maybe a bit personally familiar. Def think if growing up now I'd be pushed hard to the far end of the spectrum and maybe understood a bit better instead of just being an outcast. But hey - I've made it this far somehow. Failing more than succeeding but still chugging along.
The related but not item is the article up on Velonews about the Field of Dreams.
https://www.velonews.com/2019/07/news/field-of-dreams-the-inside-story-of-kansass-grass-velodrome_497324
been talking with my brother about doing something like this at his farm. There is the space, but is there the draw? Would be even better to find a spot somewhere in PVD or EP to set something like this up.
Smackdown tonight - it is hot, but i'm pretty well adapted to the heat bu now. not fast but hey - I am what I am.
heddwch
G
https://www.washingtonpost.com/sports/2019/07/29/kelly-catlin-death-cyclist/
this phrase caught me a bit off guard, like I mentioned on Twitter this morning:
the most emotionless of [medical] specialties: looking through a microscope. And for decades his charge was finding answers that, to others, were invisible — but, if he zoomed in enough, were there somewhere.
But there was much more serious depth given than any other previous story about Kelly.
Also checked out a book recommended by iworedettos: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/249042.Darkness_Visible I haven't started reading it but it is lined up next in the cue.
Of course reading Baldacci's Memory Man series is probably messing with me more than distracting. But it is predictable and the social dysfunction and his memory is maybe a bit personally familiar. Def think if growing up now I'd be pushed hard to the far end of the spectrum and maybe understood a bit better instead of just being an outcast. But hey - I've made it this far somehow. Failing more than succeeding but still chugging along.
The related but not item is the article up on Velonews about the Field of Dreams.
https://www.velonews.com/2019/07/news/field-of-dreams-the-inside-story-of-kansass-grass-velodrome_497324
been talking with my brother about doing something like this at his farm. There is the space, but is there the draw? Would be even better to find a spot somewhere in PVD or EP to set something like this up.
Smackdown tonight - it is hot, but i'm pretty well adapted to the heat bu now. not fast but hey - I am what I am.
heddwch
G
Sunday, July 28, 2019
The Rest of the Tabs
And now the browser on the phone is cleaned up.
Have I read all these? No, but some of them. Interesting in a way what they are. Not surprising I guess. Not at all.
1: https://thebaffler.com/outbursts/surely-youre-a-creep-mr-feynman-mcneill
Something to keep in mind - esp in the sciences. Sure we have a groper in chief now and the white good ol'boys are loving it up but the science bro stuff exists too. That article is a good delve into that. Esp since Feynman has been a source of inspiration and all that over the years, to be honest, at times I envied the womanizing ability - that's the shy awkward part of me but the part that kept me from all that also recognized how wrong that behavior is and why I could never get close to trying it in any way. Even if I had the courage.
Treat people like people. All of them.
2: https://bjsm.bmj.com/content/52/23/1497 "Fascial tissue research in sports medicine: from molecules to tissue adaptation, injury and diagnostics: consensus statement "
yup - sports stuff
3: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/29370143 "Post-Exercise Carbohydrate-Energy Replacement Attenuates Insulin Sensitivity and Glucose Tolerance the Following Morning in Healthy Adults"
insulin and glucose stuff
4: https://www.outsideonline.com/2317006/invisible-benefits-running
Pretty sure most of the arguments can be made if you substitute running for any other physical activity, like say cycling but perhaps not.
5: https://www.independent.ie/sport/other-sports/cycling/paul-kimmage-talks-to-floyd-landis-he-won-the-tour-de-france-then-lost-it-for-doping-and-it-almost-cost-him-his-life-37164135.html
still haven't read this one through- almost did now but a few more tabs to get through
6: https://www.npr.org/sections/world-cafe/2018/07/10/627303708/world-cafe-frank-turner-breaks-down-the-collective-problem-with-politics
This one you can listen to if you're so inclined.
7: https://www.mercurynews.com/2018/06/22/a-race-against-suicide-why-this-former-olympian-is-opening-up/
And here's another bit wrapping up quite a bit - Bourdain, my 90s MTB crush Furtado, a reminder that I've been pretty damn lucky...
I am very lucky, I feel pretty alone most of the time but I'm not. In the past I've had people to ride with but like life - I move at a different pace and right now I have no one, I also have little time. Most people seem to have moved over to Mt biking more and more. The whole get in the car to go ride and then drive home thing never sits right with me, that and I don't have a MTB that is compatible with the trails around here.
Supposed to be doing the early shopping today. Haven't managed that yet. Might skip it for afternoon shopping and do battle with the emptier store shelves and more crowded aisles but, maybe I'll finish writing, make a coffee and still manage to get to the store, home and then to the bike shop before noon. Kind of have to get my ass up out of bed, the one cup of coffee is making me functional so that's good and having a slow morning is much needed.
Going through the tabs has been an interesting self evaluation exercise.
Now browsers are clear. Actually the tablet (I'm typing on it now) has all these tabs, so I'll go through them once more before closing them).
Cued up an audiobook for the bike building - The Feed. interesting, kind of the opposite of the Medusa chronicles that I listened to a bit ago. or at least different take on implanted connectivity. In this case what happens when it goes away. Not sure I like it but I started it so will finish it.
Alright - need more coffee, maybe racing through the morning will boost productivity for the rest of the day and I'll get stuff accomplished. and then come home and make dinner instead of being a useless lump.
heddwch
G
Have I read all these? No, but some of them. Interesting in a way what they are. Not surprising I guess. Not at all.
1: https://thebaffler.com/outbursts/surely-youre-a-creep-mr-feynman-mcneill
Something to keep in mind - esp in the sciences. Sure we have a groper in chief now and the white good ol'boys are loving it up but the science bro stuff exists too. That article is a good delve into that. Esp since Feynman has been a source of inspiration and all that over the years, to be honest, at times I envied the womanizing ability - that's the shy awkward part of me but the part that kept me from all that also recognized how wrong that behavior is and why I could never get close to trying it in any way. Even if I had the courage.
Treat people like people. All of them.
2: https://bjsm.bmj.com/content/52/23/1497 "Fascial tissue research in sports medicine: from molecules to tissue adaptation, injury and diagnostics: consensus statement "
yup - sports stuff
3: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/29370143 "Post-Exercise Carbohydrate-Energy Replacement Attenuates Insulin Sensitivity and Glucose Tolerance the Following Morning in Healthy Adults"
insulin and glucose stuff
4: https://www.outsideonline.com/2317006/invisible-benefits-running
Pretty sure most of the arguments can be made if you substitute running for any other physical activity, like say cycling but perhaps not.
5: https://www.independent.ie/sport/other-sports/cycling/paul-kimmage-talks-to-floyd-landis-he-won-the-tour-de-france-then-lost-it-for-doping-and-it-almost-cost-him-his-life-37164135.html
still haven't read this one through- almost did now but a few more tabs to get through
6: https://www.npr.org/sections/world-cafe/2018/07/10/627303708/world-cafe-frank-turner-breaks-down-the-collective-problem-with-politics
This one you can listen to if you're so inclined.
7: https://www.mercurynews.com/2018/06/22/a-race-against-suicide-why-this-former-olympian-is-opening-up/
And here's another bit wrapping up quite a bit - Bourdain, my 90s MTB crush Furtado, a reminder that I've been pretty damn lucky...
I am very lucky, I feel pretty alone most of the time but I'm not. In the past I've had people to ride with but like life - I move at a different pace and right now I have no one, I also have little time. Most people seem to have moved over to Mt biking more and more. The whole get in the car to go ride and then drive home thing never sits right with me, that and I don't have a MTB that is compatible with the trails around here.
Supposed to be doing the early shopping today. Haven't managed that yet. Might skip it for afternoon shopping and do battle with the emptier store shelves and more crowded aisles but, maybe I'll finish writing, make a coffee and still manage to get to the store, home and then to the bike shop before noon. Kind of have to get my ass up out of bed, the one cup of coffee is making me functional so that's good and having a slow morning is much needed.
Going through the tabs has been an interesting self evaluation exercise.
Now browsers are clear. Actually the tablet (I'm typing on it now) has all these tabs, so I'll go through them once more before closing them).
Cued up an audiobook for the bike building - The Feed. interesting, kind of the opposite of the Medusa chronicles that I listened to a bit ago. or at least different take on implanted connectivity. In this case what happens when it goes away. Not sure I like it but I started it so will finish it.
Alright - need more coffee, maybe racing through the morning will boost productivity for the rest of the day and I'll get stuff accomplished. and then come home and make dinner instead of being a useless lump.
heddwch
G
Saturday, July 27, 2019
Three Tabs
I've had three tabs open on the browser on the tablet for a very long time now. Perhaps 5 if you want to include TSP forum and blogger dashboard tabs. But those two are regulars.
I just went back and re-read the other three. Probably so I can close them and move on.
They are good tabs.
Really good stories all pretty key to my core i guess. Music and food in simple terms.
More complexly is who and the writing.
First https://explorepartsunknown.com/bhutan/anthony-bourdain-darren-aronofsky/
Yeah - still gets me now... that one hurts, but am grateful for the confirmation about the choice I had just made before falling asleep and waking up to that news.
Second http://atwoodmagazine.com/ftbmk-frank-turner-interview-be-more-kind/
That interview is gold. Pure and simple. In the way I think Darren's piece on Tony is so real, Frank in this one much the same. And he's still here as a bonus, so many good bits in that interview. Not a short interview, but the best ones never are. I have read it twice before, skimmed it from start to finish just now, glancing through, touching down and reading a few fully... esp if I'm going to be closing these once I hit publish here.
Third https://amp.foodandwine.com/lifestyle/books/joy-of-cooking
The title more than anything else, no? Beethoven is the composer I listened to completely from a full 3+ dozen vinyl record set of his works. Sonatas, concertos and symphonies. The 9th stuck with me. The violin concerto as well. But the book, always went to that first growing up. More approachable and simpler. Recipes were easy, they worked. A good place to start as a kid cooking. I got my own copy after i graduated college, a cheap printing of it. Eventually replaced with larger format, glossier, more complex books. Cook books after cook books. Ultimately the perfect size seem to be the Gourmet ones and the big Bittman ones. But this one has a longer history. Of course there was the 'cameo' in Julia and Julia, that film is a whole 'nother bit of an emotional side track but also tied into this tab I suppose.
that's it - time to close them and move on. Maybe I'll do a post for the tabs open on the phone browser. Some have been there for a while and I think maybe I haven't read them because it is maybe too small of a device to get into the words and read them?
For now, I'm going to go to bed. It is early. I am tired. No days off, going to work tomorrow, but maybe not the full day. Def not going to try and do a ride.
have a good weekend
heddwch
G
I just went back and re-read the other three. Probably so I can close them and move on.
They are good tabs.
Really good stories all pretty key to my core i guess. Music and food in simple terms.
More complexly is who and the writing.
First https://explorepartsunknown.com/bhutan/anthony-bourdain-darren-aronofsky/
Yeah - still gets me now... that one hurts, but am grateful for the confirmation about the choice I had just made before falling asleep and waking up to that news.
Second http://atwoodmagazine.com/ftbmk-frank-turner-interview-be-more-kind/
That interview is gold. Pure and simple. In the way I think Darren's piece on Tony is so real, Frank in this one much the same. And he's still here as a bonus, so many good bits in that interview. Not a short interview, but the best ones never are. I have read it twice before, skimmed it from start to finish just now, glancing through, touching down and reading a few fully... esp if I'm going to be closing these once I hit publish here.
Third https://amp.foodandwine.com/lifestyle/books/joy-of-cooking
The title more than anything else, no? Beethoven is the composer I listened to completely from a full 3+ dozen vinyl record set of his works. Sonatas, concertos and symphonies. The 9th stuck with me. The violin concerto as well. But the book, always went to that first growing up. More approachable and simpler. Recipes were easy, they worked. A good place to start as a kid cooking. I got my own copy after i graduated college, a cheap printing of it. Eventually replaced with larger format, glossier, more complex books. Cook books after cook books. Ultimately the perfect size seem to be the Gourmet ones and the big Bittman ones. But this one has a longer history. Of course there was the 'cameo' in Julia and Julia, that film is a whole 'nother bit of an emotional side track but also tied into this tab I suppose.
that's it - time to close them and move on. Maybe I'll do a post for the tabs open on the phone browser. Some have been there for a while and I think maybe I haven't read them because it is maybe too small of a device to get into the words and read them?
For now, I'm going to go to bed. It is early. I am tired. No days off, going to work tomorrow, but maybe not the full day. Def not going to try and do a ride.
have a good weekend
heddwch
G
Friday, July 26, 2019
well it went
The TT happened, I went faster than I did in week 1, felt better but still didn't feel like everything was left out there.
I did feel like shit. Got dropped on the ride out to it. Dropped by the easy pedaling guys after the fast guys took off. Dropped a few times.
Started 4th out of 18. Slowest times start first. But I wasn't passed, even though I didn't pass anyone. It was strange, like there's just a shit ton of resistance on that bike, or I'm just a big bit of plywood moving through the air. The wheels roll just fine, bearings are good, tires aren't the fastest but they aren't terrible. Wheels aren't super heavy but they aren't aero. Position is more tucked (lower bars) than the rest of my bikes. But still it feels slow. Maybe that's just the feel, but it also seems to hold true in actual metrics.
No matter - I look back and I have never ridden this bike there w/o aero gear of some sort. Haven't done the TT w/o either the disc wheel or the aerobars or helmet, usually all of the above. Def faster with that stuff.
I felt good about getting the Heart Rate up and tried to stay pretty consistent. I did feel like I left a bit on the table before Reynolds but couldn't go any harder there so maybe not?
Curious to see what next week looks like. I left with everyone last night but before we even got to Peck I was 100yards behind them and riding alone the rest of the way home.
BUT I turned onto Fairview and started riding hard. Tried to go as hard as I could but couldn't do much more work than to get the HR up to 140 or so, but still I managed to keep that effort level pretty consistent for 20 mins. Not a perfect 2x20min interval, but not too bad. Does the second one help? Maybe. Maybe not. Was I tired at home? yeah really tired, didn't get home till really late. 8:30ish or so. Garmin had switched to post sunset screen well before I got home.
Bike isn't fast but who cares - if i'm working harder that means I'm doing more work, that's the point. And I did do better than I did the first week and that's all that matters. steady improvement. And if it came on a day I was feeling pretty bad? That's great. Maybe if I can have a good day it'll feel even better.
Today though...
Long day.
Rode the Crockett today, but somehow despite productive day I'm in the blah mood. Dark cloud moving in, hanging over.
Can't quite shake it, I seem to escape from it for a few minutes only to be back under the full weight the next.
Odd timing though. Maybe not.
We'll see what the weekend brings. End of the day here, will swing through the bike shop see what's up over there before heading home. maybe should have ridden the e-bike today, but felt like the crockett, gotta keep rotating eh? Would have ridden the single speed but I need to get the brake pads put on that thing before riding it again. maybe i'll do that tonight - or read, after dishes and dinner and more dishes.
heddwch
g
I did feel like shit. Got dropped on the ride out to it. Dropped by the easy pedaling guys after the fast guys took off. Dropped a few times.
Started 4th out of 18. Slowest times start first. But I wasn't passed, even though I didn't pass anyone. It was strange, like there's just a shit ton of resistance on that bike, or I'm just a big bit of plywood moving through the air. The wheels roll just fine, bearings are good, tires aren't the fastest but they aren't terrible. Wheels aren't super heavy but they aren't aero. Position is more tucked (lower bars) than the rest of my bikes. But still it feels slow. Maybe that's just the feel, but it also seems to hold true in actual metrics.
No matter - I look back and I have never ridden this bike there w/o aero gear of some sort. Haven't done the TT w/o either the disc wheel or the aerobars or helmet, usually all of the above. Def faster with that stuff.
I felt good about getting the Heart Rate up and tried to stay pretty consistent. I did feel like I left a bit on the table before Reynolds but couldn't go any harder there so maybe not?
Curious to see what next week looks like. I left with everyone last night but before we even got to Peck I was 100yards behind them and riding alone the rest of the way home.
BUT I turned onto Fairview and started riding hard. Tried to go as hard as I could but couldn't do much more work than to get the HR up to 140 or so, but still I managed to keep that effort level pretty consistent for 20 mins. Not a perfect 2x20min interval, but not too bad. Does the second one help? Maybe. Maybe not. Was I tired at home? yeah really tired, didn't get home till really late. 8:30ish or so. Garmin had switched to post sunset screen well before I got home.
Bike isn't fast but who cares - if i'm working harder that means I'm doing more work, that's the point. And I did do better than I did the first week and that's all that matters. steady improvement. And if it came on a day I was feeling pretty bad? That's great. Maybe if I can have a good day it'll feel even better.
Today though...
Long day.
Rode the Crockett today, but somehow despite productive day I'm in the blah mood. Dark cloud moving in, hanging over.
Can't quite shake it, I seem to escape from it for a few minutes only to be back under the full weight the next.
Odd timing though. Maybe not.
We'll see what the weekend brings. End of the day here, will swing through the bike shop see what's up over there before heading home. maybe should have ridden the e-bike today, but felt like the crockett, gotta keep rotating eh? Would have ridden the single speed but I need to get the brake pads put on that thing before riding it again. maybe i'll do that tonight - or read, after dishes and dinner and more dishes.
heddwch
g
Thursday, July 25, 2019
The Nova Story
Saw this as part of the open tabs adventure of opening and then closing dozens of dead links today:
yeah i've been doing that more lately.
A nice break from FB and Twitter. A good way of viewing the world, it was really a better place back when everyone was just blogging or on myspace and twitter and FB didn't exist and if we wanted content we had to create it or look harder for it.
The fictional nature of the story is super depressing because of a few very significant people I know who've died due to brain cancer.
lots of implausible things in the story too - dog gone that long?
The twitter thread about the guy and the van trip with the brick of heroin was more believable. But perhaps even though fake true story - it was too good to be actual fact.
Stories are important. How you tell them. A good writer, a novelist, is a good story teller.
I've been reading good stories lately. No desire to try and become one. writing more than what I plunk down here seems daunting. I do very frequently lately have an urge to revive the old Two Cone Wrenches and a Megaphone column. But the last article for that I started is still languishing unfinished on google drive. Perhaps I'll work on that instead of reading a book.
Two posts in one day - two too many eh?
probably
heddwch
G
yeah i've been doing that more lately.
A nice break from FB and Twitter. A good way of viewing the world, it was really a better place back when everyone was just blogging or on myspace and twitter and FB didn't exist and if we wanted content we had to create it or look harder for it.
The fictional nature of the story is super depressing because of a few very significant people I know who've died due to brain cancer.
lots of implausible things in the story too - dog gone that long?
The twitter thread about the guy and the van trip with the brick of heroin was more believable. But perhaps even though fake true story - it was too good to be actual fact.
Stories are important. How you tell them. A good writer, a novelist, is a good story teller.
I've been reading good stories lately. No desire to try and become one. writing more than what I plunk down here seems daunting. I do very frequently lately have an urge to revive the old Two Cone Wrenches and a Megaphone column. But the last article for that I started is still languishing unfinished on google drive. Perhaps I'll work on that instead of reading a book.
Two posts in one day - two too many eh?
probably
heddwch
G
Tears in the Rain
I mean who didn't go watch this clip again - or at least replay it in their head when they hear that Rutger Hauer died the other day:
I couldn't but help watch it a couple times.
I suppose I could have cued it up to the start of the monologue but nah. Sure I'm linking in to someone cash machine - oh well.
Smackdown was interesting, I still struggled a bit compared to everyone else but I felt like there was a little extra there - or if not that much extra the perceived effort was lower even though the physical limit might have been the same? Make sense? I dunno, maybe. Times are consistent, a good thing, effort is there, functionality after riding is getting better. I need to keep working at it but maybe there is a tiny measure of improvement happening.
CX season calendar is sort of sliding in place. Thinking maybe no big events? Maybe still focus on Singlespeed a bit and let the other races fall as they do. Gloucester? Dunno, the 40+ and the Cat 3 haven't been filling last couple years, no pressure to decide, maybe just the saturday again? Maybe not? NoHo? Was thinking about NoHo a bit and the history I have with that venue, the location, the experiences there, the emotions, from nearly killing the Chief UCI official in a crash to finding keys to being unexpectedly given a simple sausage after a really long day. To driving up there in a volvo held together with a crushed tomato can, spokes and hardware cloth (the exhaust that is). I can replay pretty much all of the races there. Do I want to go back? Sort of, but not really. Replaying all that got me thinking about me drinking, there certainly was plenty of that there over the years, esp fresh in my mind was '14... and then maybe why I went from mostly under control and getting faster and feeling like I had control and a direction to point in to re-inventing myself the next year and declining, new team kits focused, ready, motivated - it dissolved. But what was left was still important, and maybe i started drinking more to evade the pain. Yeah my brain has been working overtime. (not sure any of that makes sense to anyone else but me - probably for the best)
Hopefully my brain will shut off for 20 minutes this afternoon during the TT. hopefully it won't take much more than 20 min to do the course tonight. last week's 22 min time was WAY TOO LONG.
Last week it def didn't shut off. The chat with Jeffrey, and how we both graduated the same year in the PacNW and went to HS that were in the same division. It was bizarre and that stuck with me and distracted me a bit. Not significantly but I think just a tiny bit. Focus, time to focus.
I remembered, riding back from the finish with everyone last week, the time I drove to Boston to pick my mother up from the Airport and still managed to get back to the start for the TT.
But somethings I forget. I forget a lot I suppose, is natural. other stuff not so much. Weird.
This reflection on the past is a little about thinking about realizing I did an okay job getting myself faster at one point. Sort of an affirmation exercise. Of course it took a meander or two down the rest of the baggage. Someday that baggage might get lost or unpacked for good. Hopefully. fortunately, unlike normally, going on this meander hasn't called in the dark clouds of depression, they have become just facts, parts of the story, nothing more. Just there. Acknowledge, move on, don't make the same mistakes again. If there was success at one point it means something was being done correctly - identify and implement.
So I am. TT, Smackdown, recovery, hard ride every other weekend or at least something longer than a commute. Do the work. Adapt, get faster, or at least feel better going fast. Accept that fast now is likely slower than in the past but that's okay too.
Working to moderate stresses at the jobs, mostly caught up, let things go, make sure there are a few unscheduled hours here and there to catch up on the little things, slowly chew through the list of less critical items.
I'm sure there were a few other things rattling around in my head - there was a phrase i wanted to write down... thought of it last night heading to bed, experiential interconnectivity? Something like that.
Something about the amazing power of social creatures like humans to have different actual experiences but relate to them and get it and all that. I think it felt deeper than it is, or actually is deeper than I'm able to recall and explain at the moment.
enough for now
heddwch
G
I couldn't but help watch it a couple times.
I suppose I could have cued it up to the start of the monologue but nah. Sure I'm linking in to someone cash machine - oh well.
Smackdown was interesting, I still struggled a bit compared to everyone else but I felt like there was a little extra there - or if not that much extra the perceived effort was lower even though the physical limit might have been the same? Make sense? I dunno, maybe. Times are consistent, a good thing, effort is there, functionality after riding is getting better. I need to keep working at it but maybe there is a tiny measure of improvement happening.
CX season calendar is sort of sliding in place. Thinking maybe no big events? Maybe still focus on Singlespeed a bit and let the other races fall as they do. Gloucester? Dunno, the 40+ and the Cat 3 haven't been filling last couple years, no pressure to decide, maybe just the saturday again? Maybe not? NoHo? Was thinking about NoHo a bit and the history I have with that venue, the location, the experiences there, the emotions, from nearly killing the Chief UCI official in a crash to finding keys to being unexpectedly given a simple sausage after a really long day. To driving up there in a volvo held together with a crushed tomato can, spokes and hardware cloth (the exhaust that is). I can replay pretty much all of the races there. Do I want to go back? Sort of, but not really. Replaying all that got me thinking about me drinking, there certainly was plenty of that there over the years, esp fresh in my mind was '14... and then maybe why I went from mostly under control and getting faster and feeling like I had control and a direction to point in to re-inventing myself the next year and declining, new team kits focused, ready, motivated - it dissolved. But what was left was still important, and maybe i started drinking more to evade the pain. Yeah my brain has been working overtime. (not sure any of that makes sense to anyone else but me - probably for the best)
Hopefully my brain will shut off for 20 minutes this afternoon during the TT. hopefully it won't take much more than 20 min to do the course tonight. last week's 22 min time was WAY TOO LONG.
Last week it def didn't shut off. The chat with Jeffrey, and how we both graduated the same year in the PacNW and went to HS that were in the same division. It was bizarre and that stuck with me and distracted me a bit. Not significantly but I think just a tiny bit. Focus, time to focus.
I remembered, riding back from the finish with everyone last week, the time I drove to Boston to pick my mother up from the Airport and still managed to get back to the start for the TT.
But somethings I forget. I forget a lot I suppose, is natural. other stuff not so much. Weird.
This reflection on the past is a little about thinking about realizing I did an okay job getting myself faster at one point. Sort of an affirmation exercise. Of course it took a meander or two down the rest of the baggage. Someday that baggage might get lost or unpacked for good. Hopefully. fortunately, unlike normally, going on this meander hasn't called in the dark clouds of depression, they have become just facts, parts of the story, nothing more. Just there. Acknowledge, move on, don't make the same mistakes again. If there was success at one point it means something was being done correctly - identify and implement.
So I am. TT, Smackdown, recovery, hard ride every other weekend or at least something longer than a commute. Do the work. Adapt, get faster, or at least feel better going fast. Accept that fast now is likely slower than in the past but that's okay too.
Working to moderate stresses at the jobs, mostly caught up, let things go, make sure there are a few unscheduled hours here and there to catch up on the little things, slowly chew through the list of less critical items.
I'm sure there were a few other things rattling around in my head - there was a phrase i wanted to write down... thought of it last night heading to bed, experiential interconnectivity? Something like that.
Something about the amazing power of social creatures like humans to have different actual experiences but relate to them and get it and all that. I think it felt deeper than it is, or actually is deeper than I'm able to recall and explain at the moment.
enough for now
heddwch
G
Tuesday, July 23, 2019
3 hr drive for a 40 min race?
6 hr round trip.
Tough call on that race for down here but those up there certainly must appreciate something that close.
Looking at the Zanc Farewell tour list got me thinking a bit more about which races...
9/8-Quad CX
9/28-Deer Farm (3hr drive away)
10/12-Mansfield Hollow
10/13-MRC
10/16-Crosstobeerfest
11/2-Cheshire (never done it also CT also far)
11/17-Putney (raced only once before and not single speed - maybe this year?)
11/30-Secret Squirrel
12/14-Ice Weasels
also listening to this right now - writing this and emailing and making next week look stupid crazy like this week.
https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4y8dWOFDCko74gkhLm7QqN
Got some super fun bits of stuff to use and talk about. Some Topeak stuff, a couple tools and a pump. A really nice floor pump. Having a smart head is nice - esp with both the kids with schrader valve tired bikes and that ancient Silca Super Pista being a pain to fill those up. Gauge is nice and big and easy to read. #preparetoride #Topeak def prepared to ride now. Which pump? The Joeblow Pro X
Going to have to use it to get the Klein up and running for tonight's smackdown.
Also got an Elite cage and bottle. Over all the years and years riding, this is the first elite bottle/cage I've had. The Cannibal isn't so much the lightest or the coolest they make but the NAME MAN! THE NAME - perfect for me doing the TT ala Cannibal style. But it looks like maybe there's a fork kicking around that can revive the paramount. Maybe not this week but soon.
The pocket tools from Topeak are also cool but, they are also in the "man I hope I don't have to use them" category, but at least finally I have a chaintool in the seat bag. But one of the tools is this one and I might have to make an excuse to play with the torque wrench on it sooner than later.
No shill - just evaluate - feedback and review if I feel like it. I'll start here - maybe throw up a highlight reel for some stories on IG - who knows. Now I have to get back to wrapping shit up so I can ride bikes.
Storm has blown over, roads are drying out. But it is cool. Not thursday last week cool but close. Already down to 65F in places. Keeping in mind it was close to 100 two days ago, these swings are crazy.
Also 65 feels really cold right now. Not sure if I should go knee warmers and arm warmers for Smackdown tonight or not! crazy, Maybe I need to do long sleeve skinsuit on smackdown so I can be more aerodynamic! Maybe not.
Okay - must get moving if I'm gonna make it there on time!
heddwch
G
Tough call on that race for down here but those up there certainly must appreciate something that close.
Looking at the Zanc Farewell tour list got me thinking a bit more about which races...
9/8-Quad CX
9/28-Deer Farm (3hr drive away)
10/12-Mansfield Hollow
10/13-MRC
10/16-Crosstobeerfest
11/2-Cheshire (never done it also CT also far)
11/17-Putney (raced only once before and not single speed - maybe this year?)
11/30-Secret Squirrel
12/14-Ice Weasels
also listening to this right now - writing this and emailing and making next week look stupid crazy like this week.
https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4y8dWOFDCko74gkhLm7QqN
Got some super fun bits of stuff to use and talk about. Some Topeak stuff, a couple tools and a pump. A really nice floor pump. Having a smart head is nice - esp with both the kids with schrader valve tired bikes and that ancient Silca Super Pista being a pain to fill those up. Gauge is nice and big and easy to read. #preparetoride #Topeak def prepared to ride now. Which pump? The Joeblow Pro X
Going to have to use it to get the Klein up and running for tonight's smackdown.
Also got an Elite cage and bottle. Over all the years and years riding, this is the first elite bottle/cage I've had. The Cannibal isn't so much the lightest or the coolest they make but the NAME MAN! THE NAME - perfect for me doing the TT ala Cannibal style. But it looks like maybe there's a fork kicking around that can revive the paramount. Maybe not this week but soon.
The pocket tools from Topeak are also cool but, they are also in the "man I hope I don't have to use them" category, but at least finally I have a chaintool in the seat bag. But one of the tools is this one and I might have to make an excuse to play with the torque wrench on it sooner than later.
No shill - just evaluate - feedback and review if I feel like it. I'll start here - maybe throw up a highlight reel for some stories on IG - who knows. Now I have to get back to wrapping shit up so I can ride bikes.
Storm has blown over, roads are drying out. But it is cool. Not thursday last week cool but close. Already down to 65F in places. Keeping in mind it was close to 100 two days ago, these swings are crazy.
Also 65 feels really cold right now. Not sure if I should go knee warmers and arm warmers for Smackdown tonight or not! crazy, Maybe I need to do long sleeve skinsuit on smackdown so I can be more aerodynamic! Maybe not.
Okay - must get moving if I'm gonna make it there on time!
heddwch
G
Monday, July 22, 2019
Already time to think about CX season?
Yeah I guess it is.
But haven't I been thinking about it for a while already? Yes I have. Thinking about trying to turn the slow pokey ride all day legs into something with a bit more rapid force contraction. Yes been doing that - not just thinking, but actively going in that direction. Totally doubting but that's normal for me. All doubts no confidence.
I did make it out for a ride Saturday morning in the heat and turned in more PRs than I can remember. maybe I just haven't ever ridden the roads we were on at more than a commuter leisure pace. For some that is true, others I know not to be, and well, maybe there's something happening.
Certainly nothing happening at the TT, but last week was barely over 60 F and raining. Cold heavy damp air - and a slight headwind. For the non-aero aka Cannibal folks (me) that was not the best. I was also tired (when am I not) and fueling wasn't best. Gotta work on being a bit more full of energy stores at that time of the night than I have been. Maybe this week will be better. Saturday morning's ride certainly was faster. Heck riding home from the TT we were talking and I was going the same pace. I don't think it is really a leg thing, I think maybe the brain thing is the bigger issue.
Still working on that.
But, while MAYBE the pedaling is working, the deliberate attempt to try and recover after the Smackdown and the TT and not do much else, and all that is certainly in the plan and focus for cyclocross, and no - haven't started running yet, maybe next weekend, but but but the hard hitting commitment time comes when it is time to sign up for Gloucester.
The eternal debate. What do I sign up for. Which race do I try not to get lapped in? the Cat 3 or the 40+ with the juniors? Tough call. eternal debate. Kind of wish they still had the 35+, 45+ and 55+ instead of the 40 50 60 breakdown. I am almost willing to put money down that once I hit racing age 50 it will go back to the 35-45-55... So what do I race? Do I even bother racing there?
Depends on the rest of the schedule I guess. Where else do I race. Not just single speed I think, but mostly? Although the Zanc series is all way far away with only a few exceptions.
So yeah seeing this link: https://www.bikereg.com/gpg19 always gets me thinking about it. Having team goals and a plan was pretty awesome. Solo - just me, very different. Should be more fun right? Less pressure? no ? Nope. It isn't.
I've been listening to this as the starting point with autoplay turned on in the office: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nK8JlTlhnjw&feature=youtu.be pandora has been acting up so youtube it is for now (with adblocker) song title probably says more than I should admit to.
Worked both days in the heat - plenty of time to think, at least when not finishing up the last of the Binti books. Such a great series. I really enjoyed them. But yeah - i did work both days - no days off, and got up early to ride on Saturday, and got the shopping done early sunday. Staying busy is what it is, relax? Recover? chill? Nah. Fuck that. Me time? that's what happens on the bike to and from work.
I had more significant stuff I wanted to unload out of my brain but, well it is stuck there in a log jam at the moment and the G'ster stuff is all that made it through today.
Weather is looking suspect for tomorrow's Smackdown, might have to do the car thing with the kid anyway, we'll see.
for now - back to work
heddwch
G
But haven't I been thinking about it for a while already? Yes I have. Thinking about trying to turn the slow pokey ride all day legs into something with a bit more rapid force contraction. Yes been doing that - not just thinking, but actively going in that direction. Totally doubting but that's normal for me. All doubts no confidence.
I did make it out for a ride Saturday morning in the heat and turned in more PRs than I can remember. maybe I just haven't ever ridden the roads we were on at more than a commuter leisure pace. For some that is true, others I know not to be, and well, maybe there's something happening.
Certainly nothing happening at the TT, but last week was barely over 60 F and raining. Cold heavy damp air - and a slight headwind. For the non-aero aka Cannibal folks (me) that was not the best. I was also tired (when am I not) and fueling wasn't best. Gotta work on being a bit more full of energy stores at that time of the night than I have been. Maybe this week will be better. Saturday morning's ride certainly was faster. Heck riding home from the TT we were talking and I was going the same pace. I don't think it is really a leg thing, I think maybe the brain thing is the bigger issue.
Still working on that.
But, while MAYBE the pedaling is working, the deliberate attempt to try and recover after the Smackdown and the TT and not do much else, and all that is certainly in the plan and focus for cyclocross, and no - haven't started running yet, maybe next weekend, but but but the hard hitting commitment time comes when it is time to sign up for Gloucester.
The eternal debate. What do I sign up for. Which race do I try not to get lapped in? the Cat 3 or the 40+ with the juniors? Tough call. eternal debate. Kind of wish they still had the 35+, 45+ and 55+ instead of the 40 50 60 breakdown. I am almost willing to put money down that once I hit racing age 50 it will go back to the 35-45-55... So what do I race? Do I even bother racing there?
Depends on the rest of the schedule I guess. Where else do I race. Not just single speed I think, but mostly? Although the Zanc series is all way far away with only a few exceptions.
So yeah seeing this link: https://www.bikereg.com/gpg19 always gets me thinking about it. Having team goals and a plan was pretty awesome. Solo - just me, very different. Should be more fun right? Less pressure? no ? Nope. It isn't.
I've been listening to this as the starting point with autoplay turned on in the office: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nK8JlTlhnjw&feature=youtu.be pandora has been acting up so youtube it is for now (with adblocker) song title probably says more than I should admit to.
Worked both days in the heat - plenty of time to think, at least when not finishing up the last of the Binti books. Such a great series. I really enjoyed them. But yeah - i did work both days - no days off, and got up early to ride on Saturday, and got the shopping done early sunday. Staying busy is what it is, relax? Recover? chill? Nah. Fuck that. Me time? that's what happens on the bike to and from work.
I had more significant stuff I wanted to unload out of my brain but, well it is stuck there in a log jam at the moment and the G'ster stuff is all that made it through today.
Weather is looking suspect for tomorrow's Smackdown, might have to do the car thing with the kid anyway, we'll see.
for now - back to work
heddwch
G
Thursday, July 11, 2019
Books are like?
Like the best drugs perhaps?
They take you places you wouldn't go alone, they transform you and poke at your brain and fire off amazing chemical cascades and reactions and...
and then...
even the longest ones...
end
and you're left alone
that mind altering drug is just a residue, you're left with a feeling of having lived that life if the book is well written.
Perhaps it is just me that feels like this.
I don't think so.
I hope not.
But still
I tend to accumulate stuff, i'm possessive as hell, not a good thing sometimes, but that desire goes along thoughts and emotions and catalogs behaviors, sure they are mostly just the fabric of creation from other humans who can tell a story, but then telling stories is human. No? Sharing, we're communal, and unfortunately tribal.
I had an interesting flashback of some serious PTSD last night. Cronoman shared a photo from the Waterville CX race. Holy shit what a weekend. Of course I can't tell all of what is being discussed in the FB page because Chabot is still blocking me over there. Kind of funny in a way, but in this case it doesn't change any of the emotions the flashback of the night recalled. When I go back and think about it, the drinking was always fun, but never ended up fun, if I had plunked my current sober self in there i might have actually had more fun, or maybe no fun, certainly different memories. But I guess looking back on the past is like looking back wondering why I didn't do this or that, getting old is the reward I suppose, we grow old and look back in furious anger at our ignorant younger past, trying to judge our past actions on current hard earned wisdom.
DB was talking about his mother and her return to drinking and then finally joining AA to make it stick the second time. I mentioned to him about some of the dreams that terrify me. someone hands me a beer in my dreams and I have to drink it, and I don't want to, I'm terrified, illogically but literally wake up scared that I might drink it. Rationally it doesn't make much sense, should be strong enough to just have a taste right? Not a problem. But then when I quite drinking coffee those years back, after a year I would go have a fancy espresso before a ride. And absolutely relish and delight in the pleasure of the taste and that buzz. That turned into a once a month, into a just before a hard ride on the weekend, to just before races and then to the current pot a day habit. Less than a year. So no, while yes I should be able to, I am pretty sure I shouldn't. esp if my dreams scare the crap out of me like that. I find it kind of amusing actually, I've used emotional scars more effectively than electroshock therapy. Probably a bit tied in with so many suicides in my life, capped by the celebrity suicide of Anthony B.
My brain has been off and distant lately. Reading books yeah. Finished the last of Greg Bear's War Dog series. Intense 3 book ride. Also reading/listening to Medusa Uploaded, finished book 2 of Timothy Zahn's Quadrail Series the other day. easier to escape there than deal with reality? or am I escaping to there because I'm having to deal so intently with reality when I'm engaged in it?
The TT starts tonight, weather is def not nearly as hot as forecast, but it is humid. And I'm going to go at it on the Klein Quantum Pro. No aero wheels, no aero helmet, no fancy bars, nothing. Just me, the bike, the clock and the road. Not going to go do a double today, that would be dumb. maybe next week. For now, go out, make it happen, and just focus on getting home. Perhaps figuring out how to do a lap time display and do a second 20 min interval post TT on the way home. That might be most efficient, get the two efforts in, and get home. Smackdown went better this week but they all went a bit slower and no Bikeworks guys showed up. We did have a big group of 15-17. I got dropped but caught back on, it wasn't a terrible night.
Brain dump time over - back to intensity, and soon riding bikes.
heddwch
G
They take you places you wouldn't go alone, they transform you and poke at your brain and fire off amazing chemical cascades and reactions and...
and then...
even the longest ones...
end
and you're left alone
that mind altering drug is just a residue, you're left with a feeling of having lived that life if the book is well written.
Perhaps it is just me that feels like this.
I don't think so.
I hope not.
But still
I tend to accumulate stuff, i'm possessive as hell, not a good thing sometimes, but that desire goes along thoughts and emotions and catalogs behaviors, sure they are mostly just the fabric of creation from other humans who can tell a story, but then telling stories is human. No? Sharing, we're communal, and unfortunately tribal.
I had an interesting flashback of some serious PTSD last night. Cronoman shared a photo from the Waterville CX race. Holy shit what a weekend. Of course I can't tell all of what is being discussed in the FB page because Chabot is still blocking me over there. Kind of funny in a way, but in this case it doesn't change any of the emotions the flashback of the night recalled. When I go back and think about it, the drinking was always fun, but never ended up fun, if I had plunked my current sober self in there i might have actually had more fun, or maybe no fun, certainly different memories. But I guess looking back on the past is like looking back wondering why I didn't do this or that, getting old is the reward I suppose, we grow old and look back in furious anger at our ignorant younger past, trying to judge our past actions on current hard earned wisdom.
DB was talking about his mother and her return to drinking and then finally joining AA to make it stick the second time. I mentioned to him about some of the dreams that terrify me. someone hands me a beer in my dreams and I have to drink it, and I don't want to, I'm terrified, illogically but literally wake up scared that I might drink it. Rationally it doesn't make much sense, should be strong enough to just have a taste right? Not a problem. But then when I quite drinking coffee those years back, after a year I would go have a fancy espresso before a ride. And absolutely relish and delight in the pleasure of the taste and that buzz. That turned into a once a month, into a just before a hard ride on the weekend, to just before races and then to the current pot a day habit. Less than a year. So no, while yes I should be able to, I am pretty sure I shouldn't. esp if my dreams scare the crap out of me like that. I find it kind of amusing actually, I've used emotional scars more effectively than electroshock therapy. Probably a bit tied in with so many suicides in my life, capped by the celebrity suicide of Anthony B.
My brain has been off and distant lately. Reading books yeah. Finished the last of Greg Bear's War Dog series. Intense 3 book ride. Also reading/listening to Medusa Uploaded, finished book 2 of Timothy Zahn's Quadrail Series the other day. easier to escape there than deal with reality? or am I escaping to there because I'm having to deal so intently with reality when I'm engaged in it?
The TT starts tonight, weather is def not nearly as hot as forecast, but it is humid. And I'm going to go at it on the Klein Quantum Pro. No aero wheels, no aero helmet, no fancy bars, nothing. Just me, the bike, the clock and the road. Not going to go do a double today, that would be dumb. maybe next week. For now, go out, make it happen, and just focus on getting home. Perhaps figuring out how to do a lap time display and do a second 20 min interval post TT on the way home. That might be most efficient, get the two efforts in, and get home. Smackdown went better this week but they all went a bit slower and no Bikeworks guys showed up. We did have a big group of 15-17. I got dropped but caught back on, it wasn't a terrible night.
Brain dump time over - back to intensity, and soon riding bikes.
heddwch
G
Tuesday, July 02, 2019
ride forever or ride fast
Right now I can do one but not the other.
Found that out at smackdown tonight. That or well, I suppose if I hadn't been dropped and had been riding with others maybe i wouldn't have been as slow riding alone. It wasn't terrible, but it still wasn't fun getting shelled there on Prospect just at the end. The Bikeworks gang attacks each stop light like a race, slow... clear... SPRINT.
Wave good bye.
It's okay, I was out there. I made an attempt and well my coach is much better preparing me for being able to ride long distances. Probably because it is better suited to me. Slow. Easy to go slow. Easy to be slow for a long time. Well I suppose not for everyone, but for me at least.
Time to work on transitioning into something a bit faster than the version of me that made an attempt to race CX last fall. I'd like to be faster than that.
Should be possible. Gonna need a plan more complicated than the one that got me through the Michigan Coast to Coast Gravel Grinder intact.
Thought a little about that tonight on the ride. Also was thinking maybe I should actually bring a road bike with a gear that i'm not spinning out at 25mph. Maybe it is time to pull the Klein off the hooks. Also thinking about the paramount and the TT starting next week. Do I ride that old alloy fork that is a bit flexy and old? Or do I skip it until I get a new fork or get the old fork fixed? Maybe it is a cannibal year for the TT. Klein it up.
Thinking - all the thinking. Don't have time to put much into action. Still buried from being gone, both at the shop and at work.
The RI Red Rooster Ronde went off well. Big enough crowd to call it a successful event, small enough to to overwhelm the Johnny's Place grand opening/open house. Weather was perfect for it too. I did die about 10 miles from the finish, probably should have eaten more food on Friday, and Saturday morning and probably should have eaten something during the ride. I was, how you say maybe, empty. not bonked, just tired. still not recovered? No I think just under fueled and exhausted. Like really really fucking tired. REALLY tired saturday. Rallied a bit for Sunday and built bikes. Way more to do there. Steady progress though.
Got bad news on Saturday. My mother fell while hiking with my step dad in the high cascades, 40-50 min drive outside of Winthrop, WA. She broke her ankle (pilon fracture) and her shoulder. Took 2 hours to get her out of the mountains once they got to her. She was hypothermic and in shock and got a helicopter ride to Wenatchee. Has been there since. Surgery on the ankle Saturday, again today. Immobile for a very long time, which will be challenging for an infinite number of reasons. So yeah that's adding a layer to everything. Working through the work, doing my best and accepting that it is what I can do and being okay with that. The frustrating is dissipating, but the work isn't. So getting back to normal. Still def NOT looking forward to taking more than a day off here or there. But I have a feeling that I'll be flying back to Seattle for another week sooner than later, given the state of my parents.
Well time to think about maybe sleeping, might be partly caught up because I can't sleep in much but I have been able to fall asleep. So, that's not terrible. Time to figure out some intervals. Always easier when you have some good positive extrinsic motivation, but hey, still can work on actually crafting a plan. Unfortunately I need to start some running if I'm gonna single speed this shit in CX season. Running, intervals, maybe something will happen. Maybe this is the year I do what we did back with MLFN and we ride to the TT early, do a full gas one and then the second full gas one as the official TT. two 20ish minute intervals. Probably not a terrible place to begin. Maybe an every other week trip up Tower Hill, maybe some of those 20/20s or something. I'll think about it while riding..back and forth to work.
Now I might read a bit before getting some sleep.
Still hungry, but maybe I need to stay hungry... could stand to lose a few more pounds, but... hmmm...
oh well
heddwch
G
Found that out at smackdown tonight. That or well, I suppose if I hadn't been dropped and had been riding with others maybe i wouldn't have been as slow riding alone. It wasn't terrible, but it still wasn't fun getting shelled there on Prospect just at the end. The Bikeworks gang attacks each stop light like a race, slow... clear... SPRINT.
Wave good bye.
It's okay, I was out there. I made an attempt and well my coach is much better preparing me for being able to ride long distances. Probably because it is better suited to me. Slow. Easy to go slow. Easy to be slow for a long time. Well I suppose not for everyone, but for me at least.
Time to work on transitioning into something a bit faster than the version of me that made an attempt to race CX last fall. I'd like to be faster than that.
Should be possible. Gonna need a plan more complicated than the one that got me through the Michigan Coast to Coast Gravel Grinder intact.
Thought a little about that tonight on the ride. Also was thinking maybe I should actually bring a road bike with a gear that i'm not spinning out at 25mph. Maybe it is time to pull the Klein off the hooks. Also thinking about the paramount and the TT starting next week. Do I ride that old alloy fork that is a bit flexy and old? Or do I skip it until I get a new fork or get the old fork fixed? Maybe it is a cannibal year for the TT. Klein it up.
Thinking - all the thinking. Don't have time to put much into action. Still buried from being gone, both at the shop and at work.
The RI Red Rooster Ronde went off well. Big enough crowd to call it a successful event, small enough to to overwhelm the Johnny's Place grand opening/open house. Weather was perfect for it too. I did die about 10 miles from the finish, probably should have eaten more food on Friday, and Saturday morning and probably should have eaten something during the ride. I was, how you say maybe, empty. not bonked, just tired. still not recovered? No I think just under fueled and exhausted. Like really really fucking tired. REALLY tired saturday. Rallied a bit for Sunday and built bikes. Way more to do there. Steady progress though.
Got bad news on Saturday. My mother fell while hiking with my step dad in the high cascades, 40-50 min drive outside of Winthrop, WA. She broke her ankle (pilon fracture) and her shoulder. Took 2 hours to get her out of the mountains once they got to her. She was hypothermic and in shock and got a helicopter ride to Wenatchee. Has been there since. Surgery on the ankle Saturday, again today. Immobile for a very long time, which will be challenging for an infinite number of reasons. So yeah that's adding a layer to everything. Working through the work, doing my best and accepting that it is what I can do and being okay with that. The frustrating is dissipating, but the work isn't. So getting back to normal. Still def NOT looking forward to taking more than a day off here or there. But I have a feeling that I'll be flying back to Seattle for another week sooner than later, given the state of my parents.
Well time to think about maybe sleeping, might be partly caught up because I can't sleep in much but I have been able to fall asleep. So, that's not terrible. Time to figure out some intervals. Always easier when you have some good positive extrinsic motivation, but hey, still can work on actually crafting a plan. Unfortunately I need to start some running if I'm gonna single speed this shit in CX season. Running, intervals, maybe something will happen. Maybe this is the year I do what we did back with MLFN and we ride to the TT early, do a full gas one and then the second full gas one as the official TT. two 20ish minute intervals. Probably not a terrible place to begin. Maybe an every other week trip up Tower Hill, maybe some of those 20/20s or something. I'll think about it while riding..back and forth to work.
Now I might read a bit before getting some sleep.
Still hungry, but maybe I need to stay hungry... could stand to lose a few more pounds, but... hmmm...
oh well
heddwch
G
Friday, June 28, 2019
lunch film
Life of Pie from Patagonia on Vimeo.
watched this eating lunch just now...
lunch took just that long to eat...
that's the time I had, and this time I'm stealing from the next spot - hopefully I'm not late.
Got me a bit teary eyed watching it. Probably means my emotions are on the ragged edge. I know they are. It has been ridiculously tough being back. There's literally no one else doing my job here. And even at the bike shop - not really there either. Coming back from a great trip to this overwhelming madness kind of sucks.
Feeling now is to just leave again and not come back until it is sorted out. Just step out. Figure your shit out and i'll come back and slip back in once everyone sorts it out. Which i guess they can't and probably won't. not that leaving and walking away is something I could or would do. Hell the car punched up a CEL on the next drive after being home. Awesome.
working hard to maintain the amor fati mental framework, but it is f'n hard.
i should probably go back and re-read and edit that long post about the race, make sure it makes sense and i'm not doing my usual and saying something that can be taken the wrong way.
Okay... oh RRRR is tomorrow - i feel pretty anxious and bad about how little energy and time i've committed to that ride this year, maybe next year we can work on that a bit better, or I just have to walk away from it... it is tough.
ah well
heddwch
G
Wednesday, June 26, 2019
linkage
https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=10219228794893952&id=1331144263
that may not work - but it is the first link to Jeff's FB post - I guess I should link to my post sharing that, but... you'd have to be friends with one of us, neither link is public.
And then it turns out Tony has a blog:https://tmaravolo.blogspot.com/2019/06/2019-coast-to-coast-gravel-grinder.html
Good write up - i almost just set up a photo with the swag (mug bottles t-shirt, top cap...) just now but didn't after seeing his photo.
Bunch of photos, I haven't scrolled through them yet:
https://www.robmeenderingphotography.com/Cycling/2019-Coast-to-Coast/
And then there are all my instagram posts - not gonna link em here - they are public - you can find em if you're interested.
#micoasttocoast is done...
until next year. Who wants to ride it with me? I'm hungry for that sunset prize!
that may not work - but it is the first link to Jeff's FB post - I guess I should link to my post sharing that, but... you'd have to be friends with one of us, neither link is public.
And then it turns out Tony has a blog:https://tmaravolo.blogspot.com/2019/06/2019-coast-to-coast-gravel-grinder.html
Good write up - i almost just set up a photo with the swag (mug bottles t-shirt, top cap...) just now but didn't after seeing his photo.
Bunch of photos, I haven't scrolled through them yet:
https://www.robmeenderingphotography.com/Cycling/2019-Coast-to-Coast/
And then there are all my instagram posts - not gonna link em here - they are public - you can find em if you're interested.
#micoasttocoast is done...
until next year. Who wants to ride it with me? I'm hungry for that sunset prize!
Other people's video of the Gravel Grinder
This one has sound and is short, a quick highlight.
This one is a full race compressed into 51 min. At the 1:21 mark or so in this timelapse you see the mud and how it stopped, we were stacked up deep as people came to a stop and gingerly and slowly worked through the mud, vs the first group that flew through in the above video and this one.
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