New frame day

Well first ride today. But new frame is the same as the old frame but this time a much louder color and much quieter. No creaking.

Finally.

Had moments of failing today already, taking a leak after getting to the office with this feeling of total dread, i really don't want to give the microscope training this afternoon. Not at all. I'm tired. But not the tired coffee fixes. But I need more coffee - the attempt to slow down the amount has worked but now i'm tired and lethargic.

I need a break.

But I need a break not just to go sit in the car for 30 hours and ride my bike for 210 miles in one stretch.

A legit break. Like yeah I don't have to wake up and drink coffee until I'm awake then move on to the next task and repeat with full attention and care until it is time to sleep. And then get up and do it again. Hell working in the shop just means I can wake up a little bit later but then feel guilty about not getting the morning stuff done and showing up later than planned.

And now i'm out of time to write.

So go read this. https://shoogslarrison.wordpress.com/2019/06/14/for-pop/
I'm still drying my eyes. My dad's in full time assisted care now. At least while his arm is healing (it is but really slowly), the disease basically has him chair or bed bound. PT is helping but they can't release him until he can do everything on his own. He couldn't before the fall and the break.

maybe i'll make the training extra short today... unlikely - i don't have it in me not to do my best...

heddwch
G