Ride or not to ride

 Smackdown, right? 

So Monday I had planned to go ride and plan the 6 hour loop. I woke up just tired as hell. Bailed, just was literally just too tired. But went to the shop as I planned later to put the rest of the special orders together, day off - good focused brainfree task, meditation kind of thing. 

No big deal, means fresher for Smackdown. 

Roll up to smackdown. clouds are DARK, the line of storms coming was pretty intense. "Continuous ground strike lighting" was how the front was labeled. That's fine but fuck not really. 

Sat there at the start weighing the options. The group was small, but also not slow, and while it was a good chance it would get wet I would have still had to have gone back to the office and then home. Was gonna get smacked by it no matter what and probably pretty hard if I rode. But so what? Well also fuck that, so I rode back to the office got my shit and headed home. Away from the storm. South. Still got a good bit of rain and lightning at the house just after I got home. 

Wise to not ride but still kind of a layer of disappointment that I felt, even though I shouldn't have felt it...  whatever, right? Then i hear that crew kid is feeling sad and somewhat left out as she feels like she might not be making the world team, so that adds another layer on top of everything. Oh and did I mention we watched Russian Doll (Netflix - time line sci-fi kind of series - very good but fucking with my head)...

And I just booked next week solid for double days after this, all be it, short week of being overbooked. Overbooked and double days mean I don't have time to deal with the incoming requests and day to day shit. that never goes away until i get to it btw. 

Oh and the TT is supposed to start tomorrow. Merckx class even. But no rim limit (60mm) and in my current mood I'm thinking fuck that. I'm better off just getting up with E on Thur am and heading out and doing my own on the CX/road/Black Blue. They are just strava timing and while i need the extrinsic motivation i'm also just kind of fed up with equipment races. And frustrated. And grumpy.

So planned to make up for yesterday by just getting some miles in tonight. Leaving in a few minutes (and coming back here for my stuff) and going through the paces of a longer than just a commute home sort of ride. I'm tempted to just take the long way home with the backpack on but also more inclined to ride w/o it and make a loop and return and then head home.

There's more storms coming but if i leave soon i can probably get the ride in and home before the skies open up again. Funny that, how 90+ degree heat breed T-storms.

go figure.

I finally ordered the hitch for the jetta and registered for the campsite at the 24 hr race. not sure if i should order another hitch rack for the golf wagon or just go with roof racks on that. 

Ticking through all the shit i have to do, slowly. 

6 hr of big river will happen. soon. Maybe the 19th...  

I'm under fueled for doing a really hard ride tonight but it is also currently 91 with a feels like 98... taking it easy and just getting the time in will be valuable.

So I'm going to do that.

And keep pushing through. 

one thing at a time.

heddwch

G