ruminating

much like the beasts that provide a popular commodity, i've been ruminating a bit, although mentally not actually doing the 4 stomach thing.

I had a few good deep difficult chats this weekend with some friends.

Why get all worked up about products or components in food stuffs?

And this morning it sort of kinda clicked. No wonder I'm never really all that happy and positive. I should be. If I step back and look at how amazing things are around me. Look around at just how fortunate I am in all aspects. I shouldn't wear anything but a big shit eating grin.

I don't. One of the gals that works at the market has commented a few times that I never smile, that i don't seem happy. It hit home a bit and resurfaced just now. There is a big of truth. I dwell too much on what I am not doing, what I could be doing better. I focus on the short comings not how much I actually am doing. And maybe I transfer a bit of that.

So if you think i'm critical of something. Just imagine what I live with daily, internally. If you take issue with me being critical of something/someone. Remember, I'm harder on myself than anyone or anything else. My harshest critique is always self inflicted. Besides. No one really gives a crap about what I say, beyond the pure entertainment value it seems. Just a soap opera in my mind.

It is amazing what one little comment about consistency can generate, no?

tristwch
G